Military Humor

[Sgt.Spoetnik 10]

lolol Loving it,some great stuff guys, haha that launcher thinks he's disposable so he disposes himself! crappy equipment but good footage,and the soldier's reaction hahaha.

[capt daniels 10]

LOL thats funny

[mr burns 131]

XU28VypI-o4

:rolleyes: :p

[Albert Schweitzer 10]

Thats hilarious Burns. I am not sure though in which scenes the rifles realy do fire and in which there is only an animation

[ross73194 10]

I have a good one:

An officers asks his soldiers: How much is 2x2? The first soldiers said "6!" and the officer responded

with an acknowledging nod up and down.

The second soldier says "5!" and the officer nods again. The third soldier shouted "It's 2!" and then the

officer unholstered his colt and shot him.

The other soldiers asked the officer "Why did you do this?", who responded with "He knew too much!"

That's funny as hell but i can't say we're any smarter. At least I'm not the "Cheer Leader Force of America" Like the soldiers and their marching though!

Heres one of my most favorite quotes "Be polite, be professional, but have a plan to kill everyone you meet." -General "Mad Dog" Mattis.

[klutch johnson 10]

I have dyslexia.

When I tried to join your site 5 days ago to report a problem that I had with my keyboard MACRO's, I thought oh no big deal I will probably get a respone and go on with my playing.

I was wrong.

The verification codes hurt my mind, like deep. I don't know if I can explain it, if they made some sort of sense I could probably deal with it using techniques but I had incredible difficulty because of the obvious changing of the code.

I'm sorry, I don't like being this way but for the saek of good people everywhere who have this, please somohew, relax some of these protocols. I had given up, literally, and I somehow got accepted. I am ashamed to be a weak person, but I am a good person and that should make up for it.

I feel like there is a a law being broken here, In america perhaps and not where you guys are, but please for the sake of the well being fix the web site policy on this, its not nescessary and way overborad.

Anyways I made it, I'm here and I fixed my problem and just wanted to let eveyrbody know about the pain a person can feel when a normal person may feel none, it hurts I cannot explain it, its like a knot behind your brain, and it grows, and grows, until its behind your eyes, and anyways I made it.

I made it.

Thanks joe

[MarkusxX 10]

in youtube "Bundeswehr funny" :D

[marsvinet 1]

Felt like reviving this thread o' gold with my own little story. I'm not in the military, but this one involves the Swedish Airforce.

I was traveling to someplace with my school class (some uninteresting stuff) and we were going to sleep at some place close to a Airforce base, but nobody knew about it. We stayed up late and felt is was gonna feel great sleeping in late. Boy we were wrong. 8 o clock the next morning the Airforce felt like sending up some Gripen Planes. Since we were right next the airfield we were all woken by the planes starting up and flying around us, and they kept flying around all day, so we couldn't fall asleep again. Never think I have had a better , or louder, morning alarm.

[Tonci87 163]

I think this can be filed under military humor. A British Sniper killed 6 taliban with one Bullet from a distance of 850meters.

During a firefight he identified an armed guy climbing over a ditch and pulled the trigger of his L115A3. Apparently that guy was a suicide bomber and he was wearing a west packed with high explosives. The explosion killed 5 other nearby Taliban.

Source in German:

http://www.focus.de/panorama/welt/glueckstreffer-gegen-radikale-britischer-sniper-toetet-sechs-taliban-mit-einer-kugel_id_3735367.html

[BatSpoggy 10]

I saw that article, that lad seemed to have been pretty prolific during his tour, too.

On an unrelated note, how do I enable the ability to post a thread? I need to ask an editing question that hasn't been answered in months of searching, but I've only got around to signing up for the forum now and apparently I can't post a new topic.

Cheers

[[evo] dan 79]

I think this can be filed under military humor. A British Sniper killed 6 taliban with one Bullet from a distance of 850meters.

During a firefight he identified an armed guy climbing over a ditch and pulled the trigger of his L115A3. Apparently that guy was a suicide bomber and he was wearing a west packed with high explosives. The explosion killed 5 other nearby Taliban.

Source in German:

http://www.focus.de/panorama/welt/glueckstreffer-gegen-radikale-britischer-sniper-toetet-sechs-taliban-mit-einer-kugel_id_3735367.html

It was the same guy who has the longest range confirmed kill according to the MOD.

[Tonci87 163]

[Jeroma11 10]

when the idian army went to bosnia they all had to be issued with driving lisences becuase they had to have them becuase NATO? said. The idians then quikly designed them and issued them.

Hey L42A, when were you in Bosnia? have you been there just the once? It looks like 1995

Edited May 13, 2014 by Jeroma11

[SabotAndHeat 10]

Our platoons favorite game was starting an extreme, but believable rumor. Then we would see how long it would take for anyone in our platoon to hear it on the FOB, from someone outside of our company.

(Backfired when two months into a year long Iraq rotation, we started the rumor we were getting extended to a 15 monther. By the next month...we were extended for real. Frigging whole year ahead of us again.)

Edited June 2, 2014 by SabotAndHeat

[pooroldspike 129]

I saw this in a Readers Digest:-

"As an observer in Italy in WW2, I relieved the previous observer at the observation post and glanced through his log, and this entry caught my eye-

TIME: 14:24 hrs- "Called in 6 mortar rounds on enemy motorcyclist despatch rider moving along road"

RESULT: "Rider accelerated"

[vilas 477]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PmRtPlRNyU

[samonia 10]

I live to take orders

Back when I was doing my military service in a heavy mortar company, we had to go on a long excercise up to the northern part of Finland. As it happened it was winter and also the coldest period for last ten years. The temperatures quickly dipped to -40 degrees Celcius. You can imagine we were a little pissed off at this.

There was one guy at our unit, who really snapped because of the weather and the bitching officers. So he decided to act out like a REAL trooper. Every time somebody gave him an order, he did the task without any complaints. But as soon as the task was completed, he just fell to the ground instantly like a wet sock and didn't move. Since there was about a meter of snow everywhere, it was really hard to find the guy after he had hit the deck. The officers tried for a while to stop this behaviour, but since he always obeyed orders, there wasn't much they could do.

Now it just happened that a general came by to inspect our positions, so our officers psychoed like hell to get everybody formed up to parade lines and such. But the poor sods forgot about our hard-core trooper who was again lying in some hole in the snow and thus failed to hear the form-up orders issued.

The general finally arrived and stepped out of his car. Our platoon leader shouted like a maniac: "ATTENTION!" Everybody snapped to attention in a split second, but before the general could say anything, our hard-core trooper lifted his head from a snowy hole some distance away and asked: "What now?" I swear I could see the veins in the forehead of our platoon leader, pounding away, especially when his whole platoon (and the general) burst out laughing...

Edited November 30, 2014 by samonia

[x3kj 1247]

How to properly deploy a Howitzer with minimal efford

sponsored by monty python's ministry of silly walk

[negah 26]

:D I guess "When in Rome, do as the Romans do!" applies here :D

google India-Pakistan border closing ceremony. it happens EVERY night and IT IS NUTS!!!!

Done as this guy on youtube proposed and found this:

Just look at them serious faces.

[Tevar 12]

Clearly this is what military life is all about

[mr_centipede 31]

And I think Hitler goose step was funny.... this one is really out of this world...

[riten 153]

@up

Trololo :D

[somesangheili 111]

ignore the weird intro

[emme 11]

Weird stuff! xD

[somesangheili 111]