[CO-05] Altis Bus Driving Simulator 2014

[GetzTheGoldfish 10]

Now After 2 hours of failure to login i have come to you to release my masterpiece.

I call it the Altis Bus driving simulator 2014

I once heard a wise man say,

Don't you ever wake up thinking, damn i wish i was a middle eastern bus driver?

When i heard him say that i figured, that's just what i always wanted so that's what i set out to do, since moving to Pakistan and starting my business seemed rather difficult my only option appeared to be this. Create a mission in Arma III called, Altis bus driving simulator 2014

And now i bring it to you the Altis Bus Driving Simulator 2014 with support for up to 5 character from the famous movie, Gay N♥♥♥ers from outer space. We have players such as Sgt. Shaved balls, Capt. B Dick, Mr. Schwul and last but not least Mr. ArmInAss all for you to enjoy on your bus driving adventure

• Downloads
  

But of course you will need to download this masterpiece.

But before i let you do that i must recommend you to play my mission using the TPW MODS since without them my mission feels kinda lonely and naked, just like my childhood. Link

And for the grande finale you have the mission available from currently one source and that is the steam workshop, i might add another link in the future but we'll see.

Mission Download

Edited February 9, 2014 by GetzTheGoldfish

[paramedic 22]

Been waiting for this to come out since ArmA 3 launched.

[b00tsy 28]

I find the picture a bit offensive tbh.

[GetzTheGoldfish 10]

I find the picture a bit offensive tbh.

I'm terribly sorry about you being offended and I'll do my best to solve that problem, but id like to quote the brilliant mind of the comedian Ricky Gervais

A comedian's job isn't just to make people laugh, it's to make them think. If there's a meaning to it, and a substance and a bit of a depth, then you're doing something. Now, here's the rub: offense, is never given, its taken.

Now think about it.

Good, you see me myself get offended by things all the time, and i have every right in the world to do so and you know what I do when I get offended? I walk away and i suggest you to to just the same thing.

Now please, accept this frog as a sign of friendship and respect.

Yours sincerely

GetzTheGoldfish

[corporal_lib[br] 396]

I haven´t watched the whole movie ( which is embebed in the steamworkshop page of this mission), but the scene I saw, seemed to me that one of the guys dubbing the movie is a BIS voice artist (dubbed Kowalski - I think - in the OPF campaign...)

Gotta play this tonight, and add some IEDs on some of the roads if I get bored lol

[GetzTheGoldfish 10]

;2619377']I haven´t watched the whole movie ( which is embebed in the steamworkshop page of this mission)' date=' but the scene I saw, seemed to me that one of the guys dubbing the movie is a BIS voice artist (dubbed Kowalski - I think - in the OPF campaign...)

Gotta play this tonight, and add some IEDs on some of the roads if I get bored lol[/quote']

Nah, you shouldn't get bored as long as you remember to turn on the reggae 420 blaze mode on the bus/truck :)

[chondo999 1]

"You've taken the task at hand and become a bus driver to serve your new masters, the Gay ♥♥♥♥ers From Outer space since you are the last remaining heterosexual white man free in the wild. So be aware." http://www.armaholic.com/page.php?id=24619

Why the need for the homophobic and white supremacist undertones? Are you oblivious to the fact that the Human race play this game-not just inbred rednecks? Take that duck dynasty bull elsewhere. Hiding under the guise of "comedy"...smdh.

[terox 316]

what the hell has happened to this great Milsim

Altis Life, now this

[RecondoGamer 10]

This is referring to a movie from 1992.

Edited February 11, 2014 by RecondoGamer

[tonic-_- 53]

what the hell has happened to this great Milsim

Altis Life, now this

I take offense to that sir..

Don't hate the creations, hate the players.

[Hoffinator 1]

The people thinking the creator is a gay-hating evil man, keep in mind he's referencing a real movie

While I can't speak for the creator's ideology, I'm sure these "homophobic and white supremacist undertones" are just there because he's referencing a movie. Watch the damn film and you'll understand the joke instead of just assuming he's a gay-hating redneck.

[corporal_lib[br] 396]

Gotta admit just realised by now the "critique" behind the joke... Altis is, like I use to joke too, Pederasthos Island, as BIS hasn´t released a SINGLE WOMAN CHARACTER for ArmA3! So it is indeed like the satirical movie (Gayniggers from Outer Space - which is produced by Dino de Laurentis, gotta respect that...) depicts: a world without women, just like they were all whipped off the face of earth... at least we still have Goats and Sheep flocking around =P

I really enjoy these experimentalisms in mission making (This, the goat simulator, terror missions like Redneck monster/texas chainsaw massacre, PONG, Rookie, etc), two thumbs up for the author!

Edited February 11, 2014 by Corporal_Lib[BR]

[mamasan8 11]

Comedy gold, I have to try this

[vegeta897 13]

Are you oblivious to the fact that the Human race play this game-not just inbred rednecks?

This is so out of left field. Where did you get this from? Inbred rednecks? What? The movie it's referencing was created by a Danish filmmaker. And it wasn't created for "inbred rednecks" either.

The film has nothing to do with racism or homophobia, and neither does the mission, or the OP.

That said, I got bored 5 minutes into playing.

[Senshi 10]

A wonderful mix of parody and trolling. How can you not marvel at this, guys?

[djotacon 190]

Now is very funny in Arma make jokes mixin a mission with homofobic and racist trolling.

Very good indeed.

Our community don't need this.

[vegeta897 13]

Now is very funny in Arma make jokes mixin a mission with homofobic and racist trolling.

Very good indeed.

Our community don't need this.

It's an homage to a satirical short film. There are many arma missions that are homages to films, some containing a lot of violence and real events that others might find offensive. Should we shun those as well? The only homophobia and racism here is in your own mind, because you think words themselves are somehow offensive. Words are words. There is nothing hateful about this. Explain to me how this is hateful.

Also, if you read what the movie is about instead of going into kneejerk reaction mode over some "bad words", you'd see that it's heterophobic if anything.

[GetzTheGoldfish 10]

Now is very funny in Arma make jokes mixin a mission with homofobic and racist trolling.

Very good indeed.

Our community don't need this.

I must have you understand that when i made this mission my intention was never to make a "good" mission but to open peoples eyes and minds for how fucked our way of thinking is.

I can tell you that if my intention would have been to look down on homosexuals and generally people with another skin tone than my i would probably have added things such as violence, stereotypes and jokes about supremacy and things such as the white mans burden but as I'm sure you've noticed none of these things are included in my mission, there's not even any kind of forced violence in my mission unless thats how you want to play it and that is just what i think is the beauty of these kinds of games.

Everything you do in my mission is to drive the so called Gay N♥♥♥ers from outer space since i found it silly that no female characters are included at this stage of this game.

If theres is something our community don't need it's people like you who wont look at things and take a second thought. (I actually find it quiet funny how someone 4 posts before you actually nailed it, although I wont tell you who was 4 posts before you and was spot on with his hypothesis I can say that his name begins with Corporal and ends with lib :p )

Now please accept this palm tree so we can be done with the claims of me being a gay hating evil man or woman?

Yours Sincerely

GetzTheGoldfish

[terox 316]

its a bloody bus driving simulator, not the 4th Reich:bounce3:

[djotacon 190]

I will not waste my time arguing with a "troll" who come here to laugh at us.

This is a simply a provocation to mock community and minorities disguising what is not.

The mission does not contribute anything to the community.

[friznit2 350]

My bus pass doesn't work! And why do I have to sit at the back of the bus?!11 This is pants rubbish. I want my money back.

[vegeta897 13]

I will not waste my time arguing with a "troll" who come here to laugh at us.

This is a simply a provocation to mock community and minorities disguising what is not.

The mission does not contribute anything to the community.

I'm no troll, and didn't come here to laugh at anybody, so why don't you respond to what I said? GetzTheGoldfish made valid points as well, and I see nothing of a "troll" in his posts other than a cute sense of humor that does not diminish the validity of what he says.

Your posts don't contribute anything but censorship to the community. Is that what it needs?

It's very ironic that you rail on the OP for acts of ignorance, yet you're the only one being ignorant here.

[corporal_lib[br] 396]

(I actually find it quiet funny how someone 4 posts before you actually nailed it, although I wont tell you who was 4 posts before you and was spot on with his hypothesis I can say that his name begins with Corporal and ends with lib :p )

Yours Sincerely

GetzTheGoldfish

For my prowess I demand a Director´s Cut version of the mission with all blackxpoitation tracks from the movie (the reggae Johnny be good ended in the middle of the mission, I need more jams to keep on truckin´...) and some IEDs for the sake of challenge ;)

And here´s a sketch I´ve done on the early days of Alpha, thou the lack of women models remains...

cheers!

[djotacon 190]

I'm no troll, and didn't come here to laugh

Learn to write proper english first to call someone ignorant first.

[novahot 1]

Everyboby please calm the funk down! The intention of this is clear, especially due to the fact that the island of Lesbos is not far away from the island of Altis.

The movie mentioned and quoted is the opposite of homophobic. It's an icon in the LGBT community (a community half as much that hysterical as this one) and i.g. was played at several themed filmfestivals.

And a headshot is always a headshot!