500 ways to tell if you play ofp too much.

[Kris 1]

1. Whilest playing rugby for your local club, you start to shout "Form line" or form "Echelon Right" to your backs in a deep, monotone voice.

2. You find your car is locked but then proceed around to the other side to see if you can get in on that side instead. When you realise the car is locked, you immediately go searching for another one which is unlocked, throwing out the occupants and driving "back to base"

3. Whilest walking in the countryside, you get an urge to lie down and pull out your binoculars every time you see a figure in the distance coming over a hill, just to see if they're friendly or not.

4. You pull into a petrol station and realise that you actually have to get out of the car to refill the tank.

5. Throwing yourself into a nearby bush everytime a helicopter flies past.

6. You have an inherant fear of water and refuse to go swimming to case you mysteriously drown a few feet in.

7. You refuse to drive your car through deep puddles for fear that it will become unusable.

8. You stop paying attention to road signs on country lanes.

9. You try and put out campfires by kneeling down next to them.

10. If somebody tells you to do something and you can't, you blindly start shouting "Negative" at them unitll they give in.

11. Whilest on a first aid course, you refuse to give up on the dummy which the instructor has told you is already dead, instead preferring to continuously give him medical aid.

12. You start to think that driving a 5 Ton truck is easier than it looks.

13. You also start to think that flying a ground attack aircraft is a piece of cake.

14. You throw yourself to the ground and crawl whilest walking down steep hills for fear of damaging yourself.

15. You have an inherant need to walk slowly and carefully up the same steep hill, but are perfectly fine with running up it sideways.

16. You are perplexed when you see container ships actually moving.

17.You think that by running very fast at chain-link fences you will somehow bounce through them.

18. You dismiss men with grey beards as evil and wanting to start World War III.

19. You peer carefully around street cornors to see if there's anybody lying in wait for you.

20.You start to think that commandeering military vehicles for your own personal use is alright.

21. You have trouble getting into boats if they are moored less than 20m form the shoreline.

22. You have a strange inability to climb ladders into church bell towers.

23. You carry a map and a military issue compass everywhere you go.

Well, there are 23 to get you started, lets see if we can get to 500.

[Yahiko 0]

24. When someone asks you for directions in a city, you tell them to move to house, 1 o'clock.

25. You have an innate abillity to calculate a 360 degree radial circle around you.

26. While watching the A-Team, you wonder why the vehicles don't bounce sky-high.

[jimz0rz 0]

27. When asked for directions you reply "Goto Df25".

28. When injured, you refuse a doctor and attempt crawl 5KM to the nearest tent.

29. You refuse to go anywhere without a waypoint.

30. You insist that your house has nothing in it.

31. When asked to sit down on a chair you reply "negative" and sit cross-legged on the floor.

32. You insist your friend wears a green hula-hoop so that you don't get lost.

33. You refuse to drive anything but a lada or a trabant.

[ALDEGA 0]

34. *moving to offtopic*

[Hilandor 1]

yes indeed moved to offtopic

(did we not just have one of these threads not so long ago??)