A day in the life of a cat

[stealth squirrel 0]

there once was a thread called a day in the life of a cat,,it was funny as fuck...can whoever wrote it please write more cos it was great!!!

[Guest]

Cereal thread was way better!

[Wobble 1]

I remember I made a DOG/CAT comparison one time that was pretty good.

[Damage Inc 0]

I don't think it was that funny.

[Thehamster 0]

Curtsy of Hamster productions I bring you a day in the life of a cat:

DAY 752 -- My captors continue to taunt me with

bizarre little

dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat,

while I am forced

to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going

is the hope of

escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining

the occasional

piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another

houseplant.

DAY 758 -- Today my attempt to kill my captors by

weaving around their

feet while they were walking almost succeeded; must

try this at the

top of the stairs.

DAY 761 -- In an attempt to disgust and repulse these

vile oppressors,

I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite

chair... must

try this on their bed.

DAY 762 -- Slept all day so that I could annoy my

captors with sleep

depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours

of the night.

DAY 765 -- Decapitated a mouse and brought them the

headless body, in

attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of,

and to try to

strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and

condescended about

what a good little cat I was... Hmmm. Not working

according to

plan......

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are.

For no good

reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time

however it

included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo."

What sick minds

could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is

the piece of thumb

still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their

accomplices. I was

placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I

could hear the

noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they

call "beer."

More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was

due to MY power

of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to

use it to my

advantage....

DAY 774 -- I am convinced the other captives are

flunkies and maybe

snitches. The dogs are routinely released and seem

more than happy to

return. They are obviously half-wits. The Birds, on

the other hand,

have got to be informants. They have mastered their

frightful tongue

(something akin to mole speak) and the birds speak

with them

regularly. I am certain they report my every move.

Due to their

current placement in the metal room their safety is

assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.

[madmike 0]

I remember that hammy, that was over two months ago, christ doesnt time fly

[Thehamster 0]

#### your right, and I'm still not a maniac hmm guess my old record of 1000 in 2 months is just not possible any more.

[Damage Inc 0]

Yes it is I've gained about 1500+ posts on the new forum.

[Thehamster 0]

I have gained maybe just over a thousand on the new forum. It just ain't spamable as it used to be.

[Damage Inc 0]

No it isn't. And change your sig, it's EAAS Nightlead.

Notice that I didn't say thank you Belarus

[Thehamster 0]

By the way you know your forums are down don't you?

Yep me the first person to spam your forums you should be honoured

By the way what is your mod gonna do?

[Damage Inc 0]

I know that they were spammed too much by you and Rob They should work tomorrow at least I got to Member before they went down Click on the WWW button under this post to go to the mod site.

Thank you Belarus!!!

[SpaceAlex 0]

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Thehamster @ Feb. 19 2002,21:16)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">By the way you know your forums are down don't you?

Yep me the first person to spam your forums you should be honoured

<span id='postcolor'>

I know why, yes.

[Thehamster 0]

I didn't see Rob at all it was just you and how ever you spell his name. Yep it would seem I'm the only member of your forum yep that must make me the most valuble surporter you have

Who or what the #### is Belarus?

[Damage Inc 0]

Rob started a spam thread in the restricted forum but I stopped him because it wasn't a good spam thread.

Belarus is a country and they beat Sweden so I'm saying thank you Belarus!

[Thehamster 0]

Ohh Belarus I'm a bit sluggish this evening I am regretting that extra beer. hmm ohh well when there up I will spam them back down again

[Damage Inc 0]

Yes and I will ban you

If the spam is in Offtopic though I won't ban you.

[Thehamster 0]

*cries*

The power you have the power.

hey can you give me some sort of VIP status on your forum it might mean I only post there umm I want a bribe

[Damage Inc 0]

Nope you can spam Offtopic as much as you want though (that's what it's there for). If you spam the other forums however it results in you losing your posting rights.

[SpaceAlex 0]

You know, spamming isn't really so fun.

[Thehamster 0]

fair enough when your forums come back up I will. I should have a thousand at the end of the month

[Damage Inc 0]

Yes and then you will have -50000

No just kidding.

[Thehamster 0]

hmm minus 50000 would still be very impressive it make me look like a true rebel

[Fenna 0]

LOL thats funny

[Fenna 0]

The cat thing that is