Pitch Wacky Missions

(I sure hope I am posting this in the right place.)

So, we all love Arma and play the shit out of it. Now, most of you/us are into the usual army related missions. You know, the whole grunt thing, which is perfectly fine. But in my humble opinion, the reason Arma rules harder than a Babylonian king is that it allows you to take things further. To think outside the skybox.

That is evident by the abundance of non-military addons we demand and come up with. Zombies, aliens, era based conversions, props and all that shit we download and play with in the editor.

So, I would like to learn about your special wacky missions that take advantage of the game's sandbox/freestyle qualities. So pitch some of them for the inspiration and entertainment of the fine members of this community. Sometimes even the most creative people amongst us run out of ideas. Consider this topic an archive of madness.

I'll go first right after I make clear that I play my missions on a four pc LAN so most pitches will be about "four guys that go apeshit" for different reasons.

Sniper Priests.

War in Chernarus is raging on. Four pissed-off orthodox priests meet up in the middle of a stormy night (in an abandoned church) and decide to end this senseless war. How? By killing the leaders of the two opposing forces.

Armed with 50cal sniper rifles, the priests ride around Chernarus on their mountain bikes trying to find targets and take them out. Nothing will stand in their way. They are on a mission... from God!

Suitable Revenge

Four celebrity playboys (guys in black suits) are ready for the party of a lifetime. The beach manor is lit up like a xmas tree, the music is loud and da bitchez are coming very soon. On a boat. But OH FATE HOW YOU MOCK ME, a helicopter appears out of nowhere and obliterates the boat carrying the ladies (and probably a lot of cocaine) and ruins the party before it starts.

Gentlemen this is unacceptable! Nobody ruins OUR damn party. Let's spend some bullets on whoever is responsible!

The four stinking rich fellows make a stop at their secret arsenal storage in the middle of the desert. They got some guns. A personal jet fighter, a chopper, some fast bikes and a lot of ammo.

The real party is just about to start...

Illegal Aliens

Agent Smith is in the bus. He returns home after a long night in the office. Agent Smith is a good guy, he just has a problem with certain individuals. He cannot stand illegal aliens. He doesn't like the color of their skins and their dark beady eyes. His is right you know... a UFO is about to blow the bus to smithereens!

and the last one for today

MegaSuperWar (Granny Nightmare)

That is actually a prank I played on a friend when he played Arma 2 for the first time. I told him that I have made a great war mission, come on dude lets play it's fantastic! So we start the game and he is all alone in a field in the middle of the night. A trigger message appears "Someone is going to contact you soon". So he waits there for a while. And then... Old women! Old women everywhere... running... walking. Hundreds of identical limping old women start to creep out of the forests, abandoned houses and bushes while earie music plays in the background. The swarm around him like wraiths.

He finally freaked out and started shooting at them screaming 'what the fuck is this man? what do they want? Where are you? What's going on?".

Oh and I was playing an alsatian, watching from a distance... barking my ass off. I did chase him around for a while too.

Your turn.

Ps: If you don't have weird scenarios I don't mind. Post your army missions, if they hold some kind of interest apart from "infiltrate enemy base, destroy AA, run like hell to evac" go wild and shit!