I go through the same mistakes that you had, lifting it to the server in a virtual machine in my house.
1 - the problem of not connecting to the mysql was it was active: STRICT_TRANS_TABLES or STRICT_ALL_TABLES
2 - create as it says at the beginning of the post folders in users / (nameofwindowsuser) / appdata ....
3 - launch arma2netexplorer
4 - Verify permissions mysql
5 - Scan errors in arma2net logs, which they said I was mildly mistake I was making.
It is a matter of getting to read more about mysql, mysql connect and arma2net.
A tip, next time before you invest so much money, a virtual machine can save very many expenses before putting a project in production.