LIBYA, CHINA, SYRIA FORM AXIS OF JUST AS EVIL

[jaxx 0]

http://www.satirewire.com/news/jan02/axis.shtml

Complete text:

"In Speech, Bush Calls Iraq, Iran and North Korea 'Axis of Evil" -- N.Y. Times, 1/30/02

ANGERED BY SNUBBING, LIBYA, CHINA

SYRIA FORM AXIS OF JUST AS EVIL

Cuba, Sudan, Serbia Form Axis of Somewhat Evil; Other Nations Start Own Clubs

Beijing (SatireWire.com) — Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the "Axis of Just as Evil," which they said would be way eviler than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of his State of the Union address.

Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil... in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the best."

Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil.

"They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad.

"An Axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And a secret handshake. Ours is wicked cool."

THE AXIS PANDEMIC

International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered.

Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical chairs. Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the Axis of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable.

With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the Olympics; Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America, while Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of Countries That Be Allowed to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick.

"That's not a threat, really, just something we like to do," said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.

While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axes, although he rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in "Guay," accusing one of its members of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.

Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately, world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.

[Albert Schweitzer 10]

I watched the speech (damm in Europe this is late at night, I want you to apreciate my interest in foreign politics )

I found that stating North Corea was destructive, why did he need to say that... the two countries slowly start to heal together...a comment like this can only do harm..harm to the people that life there isolated from their familiy in South Corea (reminds me of East Germany )

Why did he say Iran? That was inapropriate cause Iran did nothing before or after Septembre 11th that could have anoyed the Americans, I feel there is an old grief like against Cuba.

With the rest of the countries I think there is no doubt that those give shelter to anyone who wants to do harm to the western world. BAsta

[jaxx 0]

Did you read my post or click on the link? This is satire.

[Albert Schweitzer 10]

So? Yes I read it, didnt consider it to be extraordinary funny, but hey...at least the topic was interesting. So I thought, save this thread before it dies and Jaxx disappears in the anonymity of this forum without getting the deserved honour. And so, I posted a comment!

Oh or did you want to keep that thread private for yourself?

[jaxx 0]

Bush mentioned three countries: NKOR, IRAN, IRAQ.

You said, why NKOR? Then you said, why IRAN? Then you said:

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">With the rest of the countries I think there is no doubt that those give shelter to anyone who wants to do harm to the western world.<span id='postcolor'>

That tells me that you thought the other countries mentioned (too numerous to list again) were seriously mentioned as giving shelter.

That tells me you didn't read the post or the link.

But thanks for helping my anonymity.

[Assault (CAN) 1]

As opposed to other people on this thread, I found this hillarious! Lets keep this silly and not political O.K.? there is enough of that in other threads.

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">as within minutes, France surrendered. <span id='postcolor'>

LMAO, good one.

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America,<span id='postcolor'>

ROFL, O so true!, lol

So I guess we in Canada are now in the: A.N.T.A.A.Q.N.B.S.H.N.T.A.A. Orginization? We will need to shorten that achronym, lol

Tyler

[ACT SMILEY 0]

Hehe That is a CLASSIC.

Seriously:

It doesn't really suit the current political situation. Sure, maybe some terrorists are in North Korea but it isn't a place that can be attacked without politcal backlash. As for Iraq, yes, it needs to be sorted out, but at the moment the USA lacks support for invading it, mostly because there is nobody to replace Hussein with. As for Iran containing terrorists, thats crap. Sure, maybe a couple of extremists are there, but no reason to destabilise the entire Middle-East because of it, after all, Americans donated millions to the IRA, but you don't see people over here threatening to bomb the hell out of the "Evil American Buisnessmen who support terrorism" and America has made little or no effort to freeze their assets while Britain has done significant amounts to freeze the assets of AlQueyda.

[el Gringo Loco 1]

European politicians are embarrased by the speech held by bush which was described as having elements brinking on absolutic and simplistic foreign policy. European countries are mainly frustrated because Bush destroys a lot of fragile diplomatic ties european countries established over the years with these countries.

EU external affairs commissioner Chris Patten said in an interview with Britain's Guardian newspaper that European governments should speak up before the US went into "unilateralist overdrive".

Mr Patten said President Bush's characterisation of Iran, Iraq and North Korea as an "axis of evil" was "unhelpful", adding, "I find it hard to believe that's a thought-through policy".

[Cymru 0]

oh dear honestly some of these politicians just dont deserve to be let out in poublic never mind help ruun a country

[Pete 1]

i just hope that Bush & co dont bring the rest of the world down with them....how is it possible that americans actually elected (they didnt, really) such a stupid and dangerous man into the power of the strongest nation in the world???

mmm..america should create a "axis of the globe" alliance with them as the only member, cos as it is now a lot seems to rotate around usa

btw,very good joke heheheh

sorry guys for bringing politics into this, but i have been in norway working and i had no time to flame usa lately...