Tovarish

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (WKK Gimbal @ May 17 2002,18:15)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">4: act completely irrational.<span id='postcolor'>

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Hasharajima @ May 17 2002,18:04)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">I AM GOING TO MARRY HER!!!!! DUN TOUCH HER!!!! SHE Is gonna be wife sooon!!!<span id='postcolor'> I'm really confused now....were'nt you ready to give up your anal virginity for a ride in a Hind? Now you want to marry the Blackhawk instead Mods, I think our friend here should be given the title "Heli-Nympho"

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (WKK Gimbal @ May 17 2002,09:56)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">you can snail-mail the photos to me, then I'll scan them for ya and upload  Just stick to the nude shots, so you don't have to put a million stamps on the package.<span id='postcolor'> LOL you're out of luck, all I got is our high school prom pictures </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Women with a sence of humor are the best ..... I just somehow get the feeling im out of my league with her. <span id='postcolor'> Yep I got the same feeling. Oh well ya never know

I overheard this conversation between a co-worker and a customer in the dairy aisle. (BTW our Jumbo egg cartons have an Elephant on them) Customer: "Are these chicken eggs or elephant eggs?" Co-worker: (Jokingly, thinking the guy's just trying to have some fun) "Elephant eggs sir! We get them in every day from India!!" Customer: (very skeptical now) "Are you SURE?" At this point I had to walk very fast to the back room because I just couldn't hold my laughter back any longer

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Ex-RoNiN @ May 17 2002,04:37)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Pictures plz <span id='postcolor'> Ain't got any on a  computer and I ain't got a scanner  . Either way I wouldn't do it without asking her first  . We've been friends for a long time and AFAIK it's still that but when it get's to the point where she threatens your life if there's a chance you can't make it....things start looking interesting.

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Ex-RoNiN @ May 17 2002,04:11)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Tovarish, do it again and I shall slap ur wrists <span id='postcolor'> And the only reason I won't is because I caused enough havoc in your hard drive thread and because your country produced the hot little thing I'm going out with tomorrow night . Gotta tell you though, after your little threat there it was mighty tempting to see if size tags go up to 5000

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Ex-RoNiN @ May 17 2002,04:02)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Tovarish, please resize <span id='postcolor'> aight sorry maybe that was somewhat excessive but I figured for Americans bigger is always better

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (SFG @ May 17 2002,03:53)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">At least spell our country with capitals!<span id='postcolor'> <span style='font-size:157pt;line-height:100%'>OUR COUNTRY</span> Happy? Â

What does that make the rest of the world? "Super-Duper-Holy-Shit-We-are-so-Fucking-Screwed-Bankrupt"??

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (denoir @ May 17 2002,03:35)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">0--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (USSoldier11B @ May 17 2002,030)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">This thread is too much. Â Â Â Becoming gay just to get a helicopter? No thanks.<span id='postcolor'> Well, I guess it is as good as any other reason to become gay <span id='postcolor'> LOL I can see it now: *Russian accent with a lisp* "To fly Hind, you must pass Joystick challenge!"

I work at a supermarket as well.... One day we had a spill in an isle so I mopped it up and put a wet floor sign .....about ten minutes later this lady comes up to me and asks me to remove the wet floor sign because she tripped over it and she felt it was a hazard!! . I must have just stood there looking at her for about a minute, then I went to the aisle, checked to make sure the floor was now dry, and took the sign away - and the whole time the braindead bitch watched me to make sure I actually removed that killer sign that was out to get her!

Well I first heard about TFC2 (and saw screen shots of it) in grade 11, I finished high school after grade 13, took half a year off to work, then finished my first year of college...that makes 3 and a half years I've been hearing about this game, so if it ever comes out it better be as good as OFP

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Hasharajima @ May 16 2002,01:27)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">If you take an AXE that is used for breaking doors and start slamming on the Hind, will the axe tear through or the Hind's armour will break the axe? And after searching long and hard and called a few aviation school, no one said they offer Hind courses. Anyone knows where I Can learn how to fly a hind in the states or in Canada? PLEASE HELP ME!! Last nite I had a dream about a hind picking me up to schooL!!!!!!!<span id='postcolor'> And that my friends, is the reason you shouldn't smoke crack. Are you by any chance from Quebec? Would explain a lot

Actually didn't he get shot dead?

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (USSoldier11B @ May 15 2002,08:17)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">How do the Ruskies feel about this? <span id='postcolor'> Are you kidding? They've sold the US a pair of Su-27's and an S300 (arguably the world's most advanced SAM system) for evaluation. "In 1995 it was widely reported that Belarus had sold elements of one S-300 air defence system to the United States. Another widely reported case in 1995 was the transfer of 2 Su-27 fighter aircraft to the United States. The S-300 and Su-27 are systems that have been exported by Russia and they are among the most heavily marketed Russian defence items. The fact that the US was in possession of examples was considered in Russia to be a potential disincentive for prospective buyers. In each case the articles were sold to private US firms known to work primarily on research and development contracts for the US intelligence services."

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Jester983 @ May 15 2002,06:56)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Okay since were on the topic of ICQ is it true that ICQ sends you phorn like every 15 mins? I remeber a friend telling me that when he had it they did. Does it still do that or did that never happen?<span id='postcolor'> Yep it's anoying as hell, just a few minutes ago I got an ICQ that went something like "Hey <my real name>! It's me Jessica! Wy don't you ever answer my e-mails anymore? I sooooo miss the times we used to cyber! Well I'm feeling very hot right now and here's a link to my webcam" In case you're wondering I don't know any Jessica and I dont cyber . I hardly ever use ICQ anymore, MSN all the way. (Looks like Microsoft actually got something right, weird huh ?)

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (USSoldier11B @ May 15 2002,06:13)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">I don't think any U.S. pilots have been able to fly one.<span id='postcolor'> Actually, the most active Hind crew in the world is in the US (no joke! I've seen a show on it, they use it as an agressor in lazer-tag wargames. It was captured from Iraq in Desert Storm. As for it flying like a tank, the US pilot who flew it and was interviewed had nothing but praise for it.

lol sorry, this is funny, but you're not going to learn to fly a real-life Hind or any chopper for that matter from a simulation/tutorial/ect

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Wobble @ May 15 2002,05:43)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">see I told you it wasnt about oil   <span id='postcolor'> </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">porn <span id='postcolor'> hmmm, it all depends on what kind of oil

Y'know, I posted this a few months ago and it mysteriously dissapeared a few minutes later, but after reading that ass-shaving thread I'm hoping maybe this time it'll stay up. This is THE funniest thing to ever grace my e-mail inbox, hell I've had it sitting there since I was a junior in high school! . Anyways, it's worth a second try, enjoy: In response to a woman who accidentally walked into the men's restroom "Please don't feel bad, It wasn't you entering the men's washroom that caused that guy to pee on the guy next to him. Hell, we do that all the time. It's rare us guys ever hit what we're aiming for. You see, something you ladies should understand by now is that men's penises have a mind of their own. A guy can go into a bathroom stall because all the urinals are being used, take perfect aim at the toilet, and his penis will still manage to piss all over the roll of toilet paper, down his left pant leg, and onto his shoe. I'm telling ya, those little buggers can't be trusted. After being married 28 years my wife has me trained. I'm no longer allowed to pee like a man - standing up. I am required to sit down and pee like a woman. She has me convinced that this is a small price to pay. Otherwise if she had gone to the toilet one more time at night and either sat on a pee soaked toilet seat, or fell right into the seat because I forgot to put the seat down, she was going to kill me in my sleep. Now another thing us guys don't usually like to talk about, but because you and I have become such good friends and you think I'm a classy guy, I might as well be candid with you because it's a real problem, and you ladies need to be understanding. It's the dreaded "morning wood". Most mornings us guys wake up with two things. A tremendous desire to pee, and a penis so hard you could cut diamonds with it. Well, no matter how hard you try, you can't aim. You have no choice but to piss all over the wall paper and that damn fuzzy toilet seat cover you women insist on putting on the toilet. And by the way, when you use those damn fuzzy toilet seat covers, the friggin, toilet seat won't stay up by itself. So that means we have to use one hand to hold up the toilet seat, and the other hand to try and control our less than perfect aim. Now sometimes, when you are newly married, (and I know the guys in here will back me up on this) you think you can get the toilet seat with that damn fuzzy thing to stay up. You jam it back and compress that fuzzy thing until the seat stays up there. OK, so you start to pee, but that compressed fuzzy starts to decompress and without warning that damn toilet seat comes fliying down and tries to whack off your weenie. So us guys will not lift a toilet seat with a fuzzy, it's just not safe. I tried to delicately explain this morning situation to my wife. I told her... look, it won't bend. She said "so sit down like I told you to do all the rest of the time. OK. I tried sitting down on the toilet with "morning wood". Well it's very hard to get it bent under the toilet seat, and before I could manage it, I had pissed all over the bath towels hanging on the wall across the room. Now, even if you are sitting down and you can get it forced down under the toilet seat, when you start to pee the pee shoots out from the crack between the bottom of the toilet seat and the top of the bowl. You piss all over the back of your knees and it runs down the back of your legs on to that damn matching fuzzy horseshoe rug you keep putting on the floor in front of the toilet. I have found the only effective maneuver to deal with this morning urinary dilema is to assume the Fliying Superman position laying over the toilet seat. This takes a great deal of practice, perfect balance, and split second precision but it's the only sure way to get all the pee in the bowl during the first morning pee. So you ladies have to understand that us men are not totally to blame. We are sensitive to your concerns about hygene and bathroom cleanliness, but there are times when things just get beyond our control. It's not our fault, it's just Mother Nature. Now, if it was Father Nature there wouldn't have been a problem..." I hope you laughed as hard as I did

LOL my sister was just on there

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (WKK Gimbal @ May 14 2002,19:55)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"><span id='postcolor'> I never noticed that before, but that looks a lot like a happy face that got punched in the moth hard and it's fat lip is covering one of it's eyes.

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (denoir @ May 14 2002,08:40)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">LMAO Tovarish   Really good one <span id='postcolor'> Yeah, can you believe some evil mod wanted to keep this from your eyes the first time I posted it way back when? Fight the power!

</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (denoir @ May 14 2002,08:19)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Vad spelar det för roll förresten? Jag skulle vilja se dig stava rätt pĺ svenska. Vadĺ? Kan du inte Svenska? <span id='postcolor'> I don't speak a word of Swedish but if there's any doubt, I would bet my left testicle that he's daring you to speak Swedish better than he speaks English

Funny that you should mention this, about half an hour ago I was playing a CTF and immagine my surprize when one of my teammates drove up to me in THIS: Weird huh? This BRDM looks dead enough, in fact I saw it take a LAW, but yet when my teammate walked up to him he still had the option to get in, and the thing was still running. The enemy team was also a bit surprized when they saw us drive up to their base in that.