USA Politics Thread - *No gun debate*

[Albert Schweitzer 10]

Notice to the Citizens of the USA

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry if this has already been posted, but I felt you all needed to be aware.

In the light of your failure to elect a suitable President of the USA and thus

to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your

independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will

resume monarchial duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories.

Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The Right

Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been

unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister

for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate

will be disbanded.

A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you

noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following

rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look

up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how

wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in

words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour', skipping the letter 'U' is nothing

more than laziness on your part. Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut'

without skipping half the letters.

You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z' (pronounced 'zed' not 'zee')

and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the suffix "ise".

You will learn that the suffix 'burgh is pronounced 'burra' e.g. Edinburgh.

You are welcome to respell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you can't cope with

correct pronunciation.

Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up

"vocabulary". Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler

noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form

of communication. Look up "interspersed". There will be no more 'bleeps' in

the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language

then you shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary

then you won't have to use bad language as often.

2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on your

behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the

reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of "-ize".

3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It

really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to Cockney,

upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). You will also have to learn

how to understand regional accents - Scottish dramas such as "Taggart" will no

longer be broadcast with subtitles. While we're talking about regions, you

must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of

the county is "Devon". If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American

States will become "shires" e.g. Texasshire, Floridashire, Louisianashire.

4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good

guys. Hollywood will be required to cast English actors to play English

characters. British sit-coms such as "Men Behaving Badly" or "Red Dwarf" will

not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy American audience who can't

cope with the humour of occasional political incorrectness.

5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but

only after fully carrying out task 1.

We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

6. You should stop playing American "football". There is only one kind of

football. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good game.

The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may

have noticed that no one else plays "American" football. You will no longer be

allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it

would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of

you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to

American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty

seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get

together at least a US rugby sevens side by 2005. You should stop playing

baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for

a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are

aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable.

Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called

"rounders" which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves,

collector cards or hotdogs.

7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear weapons if they

give you any merde. The 97.85% of you who were not aware that there is a world

outside your borders should count yourselves lucky. The Russians have never

been the bad guys. "Merde" is French for "5hit". You will no longer be allowed

to own or carry guns. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything

more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because we don't believe you

are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you will require a

permit if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national

holiday, but only in England. It will be called "Indecisive Day".

9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own

good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road

intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. You will start driving on the

left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with

immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and

metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are

not real chips. Fries aren't even French, they are Belgian though 97.85% of

you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of

a country called Belgium. Those things you insist on calling potato chips are

properly called "crisps". Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat.

The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer which should be served warm and

flat. Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea

made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for

tea made within the city of Boston itself.

12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer

at all, it is lager. From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be

referred to as "beer", and European brews of known and accepted provenance

will be referred to as "Lager". The substances formerly known as "American

Beer" will henceforth be referred to as "Near-Frozen Knat's Urine", with the

exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will

be referred to as "Weak Near-Frozen Knat's Urine".

This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in

Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.

13. From December 1st the UK will harmonise petrol (or "Gasoline" as you will

be permitted to keep calling it until April 1st 2005) prices with the former

USA. The UK will harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the

Former USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices (roughly $6/US gallon - get

used to it).

14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or

therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that

you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by

adults.

If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or

speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.

15. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.

Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to

ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).

Thank you for your cooperation.

[theavonlady 2]

Albert, that's ancient and has been posted already ages ago more than once.

For this you returned from your leave of absence?

[Pathy 0]

Its great though.

For anyone who wants to instantly quote it at anybody, i have a version at http://raab.ofpcentral.com/NOTICE.htm

[Akira 0]

Quote[/b] ]6. You should stop playing American "football". There is only one kind of

football. What you refer to as American "football" is not a very good game.

The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may

have noticed that no one else plays "American" football. You will no longer be

allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it

would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of

you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to

American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty

seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get

together at least a US rugby sevens side by 2005. You should stop playing

baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for

a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are

aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable.

Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called

"rounders" which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves,

collector cards or hotdogs.

Don't you even bust on my football

Quote[/b] ]American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty

seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies)

Lets see you take on a 300+ pound defensive lineman and see how much of a nancy your are

[theavonlady 2]

Quote[/b] ]American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty

seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies)

Lets see you take on a 300+ pound defensive lineman and see how much of a nancy your are    

They've got a point when you wear the kevlar under skin-tight leotards.

[billybob2002 0]

Quote[/b] ]Oh, well, gee... that makes all the difference, a professor without a PhD in bumfuck Alabama thinks it is bad because of reasons you can't remember. How foolish of me to believe the world's top climatologists could be right on this one.

You do not want me to start bashing your country, no. Also, I do not live in Alabama. Furthermore, my professor has an Dr. in front of her name and my TA is an Dr. to be (forgot which fields).

With your sad attempt to degrade me, I now know the reasons:  

1. the whole concept of emission trading is BS. Let me use your unpolluted air to pollute my air.

2. the growing of new trees will in turn create more CO2.

3. I do not remember the % of climate change but is very (and I mean very) low.

4. She did said it was complicated but did not explain the reasons.

5. Will Kyoto really stop people in america from buying SUVs and those types of vehicles? You see the gas prices did not stop people from filling up.

6. Economy....

She did not like Kyoto but the concept (lower of emissions and crap) was grand. Basically she wanted something else.... it was a start...

Quote[/b] ]Socialist? Who said anything about Socialism? On the contrary, I'm saying that we're going away from ideology driven politics to a much more pragmatic trade driven.

Quote[/b] ]or possibly by size of their contributions to the global economy - at least to start with until we get a more homogenous wealth distribution in the world).

Oops... a hint of socialism

Quote[/b] ]

So what. What ever you may "believe" the fact is the dollar continues to slide against the Euro and has been for the last few years.

There you go, again. A strong euro means a weak dollar.. which i'm NOT FOR. Can't I play devil advocate with some of posts? Billybob2002 is worried about the deficit that is causing it.

Quote[/b] ]Whats socialism have to do with it? If socialism is being more responsible in the world we share (not own) than maybe the US needs a hefty dose of socialism.

Moving to Canada or Europe, eh?

[CosmicCastaway 0]

Quote[/b] ]

1. the whole concept of emission trading is BS. Let me use your unpolluted air to pollute my air.

2. the growing of new trees will in turn create more CO2.

3. I do not remember the % of climate change but is very (and I mean very) low.

4. She did said it was complicated but did not explain the reasons.

5. Will Kyoto really stop people in america from buying SUVs and those types of vehicles? You see the gas prices did not stop people from filling up.

6. Economy....

Methinks you REALLY need to re-evaluate these so called 'reasons'.

[ralphwiggum 6]

Quote[/b] ]Oh, well, gee... that makes all the difference, a professor without a PhD in bumfuck Alabama thinks it is bad because of reasons you can't remember. How foolish of me to believe the world's top climatologists could be right on this one.

You do not want me to start bashing your country, no. Also, I do not live in Alabama. Furthermore, my professor has an Dr. in front of her name and my TA is an Dr. to be (forgot which fields).

the recent bad vibe started when you said, "BTW, you[denoir] are a poster boy on why people voted for Bush or somebody else and not Kerry dealing with foreign politics." If you want to start something be prepared to get equal treatment.

you want to talk about issues, ok, but singling out a person is nothing but a bad attempt to go off road.

Every professor(or most) have phD. sometimes someone with a master's degree can lecture too. just because there is 'Dr' in front of name doesn't mean a shit. just look at some of the cases where having such prefix does not help at all. Dr.Zeus, Dr. Monroe( )

it s interesting that some of the literattis are deemed as 'liberals' and hackled upon, but when some other with same degree supports the agenda, they are given all the limelights.

FYI, denoir has master's degree, IIRC, and I was also a Dr. to be in economics, but now changed subject to mathematics. maybe you should listen to us.

The Kyoto treaty wascrticized because 1)environmentalists thought it was not the solution,but trading emissions, which is immoral 2)rightwingers thought it was a hippy thing.

[billybob2002 0]

Quote[/b] ]

1. the whole concept of emission trading is BS. Let me use your unpolluted air to pollute my air.

2. the growing of new trees will in turn create more CO2.

3. I do not remember the % of climate change but is very (and I mean very) low.

4. She did said it was complicated but did not explain the reasons.

5. Will Kyoto really stop people in america from buying SUVs and those types of vehicles? You see the gas prices did not stop people from filling up.

6. Economy....

Methinks you REALLY need to re-evaluate these so called 'reasons'.

Er... young trees do produce CO2 for a temp. time.

Quote[/b] ]

it s interesting that some of the literattis are deemed as 'liberals' and hackled upon, but when some other with same degree supports the agenda, they are given all the limelights.

I was just shocked. Anyway, TA admitted she did not vote for Bush because of nuclear mountain and etc.

Quote[/b] ]environmentalists thought it was not the solution,but trading emissions, which is immoral

Quote[/b] ]

the whole concept of emission trading is BS. Let me use your unpolluted air to pollute my air.

Quote[/b] ]but now changed subject to mathematics.

Help me in math...

[ralphwiggum 6]

Help me in math...  

sure, let me know when you count five red boxes under your avatar.

[billybob2002 0]

Help me in math...  

sure, let me know when you count five red boxes under your avatar.  

You will never ban me...

[CosmicCastaway 0]

Er... young trees do produce CO2 for a temp. time.

Sure do, as do adult trees. However the amount they release back through respiration, is generally less than they fix from the atmosphere, meaning that forests are a 'sink' for carbon.

6H20 + 6C02 = C6H12o6(Carbohydrate) +6O2

Plus of course they conveniently convert water and carbon dioxide into carbohydrate and oxygen.

Nice of them eh? ;)

[billybob2002 0]

Er... young trees do produce CO2 for a temp. time.

Sure do, as do adult trees. However the amount they release back through respiration, is generally less than they fix from the atmosphere, meaning that forests are a 'sink' for carbon.

6H20 + 6C02 = C6H12o6(Carbohydrate) +6O2

Plus of course they conveniently convert water and carbon dioxide into carbohydrate and oxygen.

Nice of them eh? ;)

Yes...carbon sink. But, in order to produce a "good" carbon sink, would require a lot of trees.

[CosmicCastaway 0]

Yup, and you get a lot of trees by planting them one at a time, time after time.

[Supah 0]

just look at some of the cases where having such prefix does not help at all. Dr.Zeus, Dr. Monroe( )

Dr. Phil! (sorry couldn't resist) The part of the Americans returning to the british empire was funny. Recently I saw some maps about the democrate states joining canada and the republican states forming another country  called "Jesusland". Seemed like a top plan, and no football is NOT picking up the ball and running with it, bunch of savages

[Akira 0]

and no football is NOT picking up the ball and running with it, bunch of savages

Quote[/b] ]The word football has a number of different meanings. In the United States football almost always means what, in the rest of the English-speaking world, is usually called American football (or in some cases Gridiron football). In most of the rest of the world, the word football means the game that is called soccer in the US, although it is occasionally called Association football or International football. Soccer, the most popular form of football world-wide, is also popular in the US, particularly as a participation sport for children. It is played at all levels, youth, amateur, high school, college and professional, and in internationals by teams involving both sexes (see: football (soccer))

The name football might seem a curious name for the sport of American football, as the players' feet rarely have much to do with the ball -- kicking the football is only allowed in certain situations and is most often inadvisable or would result in a penalty. The vast majority of game time involves players holding the ball in their hands as they run. However, the sport is a direct descendant of rugby union football (which in turn descended from soccer), as explained below, and has retained the name.

In fact the word soccer is of British origin, being a corruption of 'Association' the governing body of English soccer being the Football Association. Football is also occasionally used by followers of the sports of Rugby Union, Rugby League, Gaelic Football and Australian Rules Football to refer to their sport. Like Americans they refer to Association Football as 'soccer'.

In the remainder of this article, the word football refers to American football.

From Wikipedia

Quote[/b] ]American football, known in the United States simply as football, is a competitive team sport that rewards players' speed, agility, skill, tactics, and brute strength as they run and throw a ball, and block, tackle, and outrun each other, trying to force the ball further into their opponent's territory and ultimately into the endzone.

It is one of the more physically demanding sports, with a great deal of physical contact occurring on every play as players often weighing 300 pounds (~135 kg) or more shove each other with all of their strength, and with a clearly defined front line, moving up and down the field, separating the offensive and defensive squads.

American football does not much resemble soccer, the sport which most people outside the U.S. call "football". Consequently, American Football is best known internationally as "American Football". However, both of these games have their origins in varieties of football played in the United Kingdom in the mid-19th century, and American football is directly descended from rugby football, usually known simply as "Rugby". According to an apocryphal story rugby football began with a football game at Rugby School in England in 1823 when a player named William Webb Ellis suddenly ran with the ball only to be tackled by an opponent. Contrary to popular belief the game played at Rugby School was not soccer (which had yet to be codified) and the Rugby School version of football had always permitted handling the ball but had banned running with the ball. This rule breaking gradually became increasingly common until it became the accepted norm. Thus was born the game of Rugby Football.

The game progressed from that point and was introduced to North America from Canada, by the British Army garrison in Montreal, which played a series of games with McGill University. In 1874, McGill arranged to play a few games in the United States, at Harvard, which liked the new game so much that it became a feature of the Ivy League. Both Canadian and American football evolved from this point. The U.S. game still has some things in common with the two varieties of rugby, especially rugby league.

I don't make fun of yoru fairies running around in their little shorts....I would appreciate the same respect

[denoir 0]

Just because you call something by a name doesn't make it a fact. Apart from calling sissy-rugby for football, you call water "Beer" and sometimes "Coffee".

[Badgerboy 0]

Quote[/b] ]In fact the word soccer is of British origin, being a corruption of 'Association' the governing body of English soccer being the Football Association. Football is also occasionally used by followers of the sports of Rugby Union, Rugby League, Gaelic Football and Australian Rules Football to refer to their sport. Like Americans they refer to Association Football as 'soccer'.

Bollocks. I don't know anyone who calls Rugby 'football' over here. We call it Rugby.

Additionally, they don't call football soccer, its football! That applies to Union and League, with Union being the more popular here. (Wales)

(Leagues crap anyway)

[Ex-RoNiN 0]

Help me in math...

sure, let me know when you count five red boxes under your avatar.

You will never ban me...

Many people have said that.......only very few remain on this board

[Placebo 28]

This is the USA Poltics thread, not the "my sportsmen are manlier then your sportsmen" thread, get back on topic please.

[joltan 0]

2. the growing of new trees will in turn create more CO2.

This is bullshit. By growing C is bound and only released again once the matter is burned or decomposes. Also, because of the short timescales involved (at max a few hundred years) burning wood (as long as it doesn't result in a permanent reduction of the sum and quality of the available wooded area) has nothing but a local and temporal impact on the CO cycle. There is the 'breathing' that also releases some CO2, but that CO2 was also absorbed from the atmosphere before, so no 'polluting there' - just a bit less absorbtion.

As for forests being permanent sinks - that is also wrong: only when they get fossilized (sp?) and thus are removed permanently from the equation (until another generation of dumbass people starts burning the resulting coal/oil for convenience again). That is not the case usually so if you add up the absorbtion and release of C over their lifetime cycle trees are basically neutral (= neither sink nor source). I.e.: they act as a short time buffer, nothing more.

The CO2 problem arises only from fossil fuels as these add ADDITIONAL C to the cycle, thus increasing the total ammount of CO2 in the atmosphere.

[billybob2002 0]

2. the growing of new trees will in turn create more CO2.

This is bullshit. By growing C is bound and only released again once the matter is burned or decomposes. Also, because of the short timescales involved (at max a few hundred years) burning wood (as long as it doesn't result in a permanent reduction of the sum and quality of the available wooded area) has nothing but a local and temporal impact on the CO cycle. There is the 'breathing' that also releases some CO2, but that CO2 was also absorbed from the atmosphere before, so no 'polluting there' - just a bit less absorbtion.

As for forests being permanent sinks - that is also wrong: only when they get fossilized (sp?) and thus are removed permanently from the equation (until another generation of dumbass people starts burning the resulting coal/oil for convenience again). That is not the case usually so if you add up the absorbtion and release of C over their lifetime cycle trees are basically neutral (= neither sink nor source). I.e.: they act as a short time buffer, nothing more.

The CO2 problem arises only from fossil fuels as these add ADDITIONAL C to the cycle, thus increasing the total ammount of CO2 in the atmosphere.

The thing I can find on the net....

http://www.newscientist.com/news/news.jsp?id=ns99992958

Quote[/b] ]

CO2 surge

The problem is soils. Forest soils and the organic matter buried in them typically contain three to four times as much carbon as the vegetation above. CarboEurope's researchers have discovered that when ground is cleared for forest planting, rotting organic matter in the soil releases a surge of CO2 into the air.

This release will exceed the CO2 absorbed by growing trees for at least the first 10 years, they say. Only later will the uptake of carbon by the trees begin to offset the losses from soils. In fact, says CarboEurope chairman Han Dolman of the Free University Amsterdam, some new forests planted on wet, peaty soils will never absorb as much carbon as they spit out.

The world's densest network of CO2 monitoring devices has revealed that Europe's forests are absorbing up to 400 million tonnes a year, or 30 per cent of the continent's emissions.

Researchers once assumed that most of this came from young forests, since old forests were thought to be in equilibrium with the atmosphere - sucking up as much gas as they spew out. But, says Valentini, old forests actually accumulate more carbon than young plantations. This suggests that conservation of old forests is a better policy for tackling global warming than planting new ones.

[Akira 0]

Editorial

Quote[/b] ]Kerik's bully history

On the night of Nov. 28, 2001, crack homicide detectives fanned out all over New York City, one of them even going as far as New Jersey. In all, five detectives from the Manhattan South Homicide Task Force went to the homes of various suspects, fingerprinted some of them, interrogated all of them and told a few that they would have to take lie detector tests. The horrific crime? The police commissioner's friend was missing some items.

The commish at the time was Bernard Kerik, President Bush's nominee as the nation's next head of Homeland Security. The crime victim was Judith Regan, whose imprint, Regan Books, was publishing Kerik's autobiography, "The Lost Son." It tells the Cagneyesque tale of a kid whose alcoholic mother died a prostitute, but who nevertheless managed to become New York's police commissioner.

Regan's items, including a cell phone, apparently went AWOL from a studio at Fox News Channel. All were later accounted for. The phone was found in a trash basket - and it is my guess that it was the real reason for such measured panic. You never know what numbers might be in a cell phone.

Right up front, I should state that Kerik always has maintained he had nothing to do with making homicide cops lost-and-found monitors. It's possible. Sometimes subordinates just do something to please the boss.

For some reason, the Fox employees initially had a different take. They accused Kerik of abusing his authority and hired a lawyer, Robert Simels. In the end, the employees dropped the matter. Nonetheless, in an interview with me, Simels had this to say: "He abused his authority."

Maybe so. And if that's the case, we are beginning to see something of a pattern. Back in the 1980s, Kerik was working as chief of investigations for a Saudi Arabian hospital complex, where he allegedly abused his authority to delve into the private lives of women with whom his boss was romantically involved. This saga, reported in The Washington Post, is once again only an allegation, but another has surfaced - this one in Newsday. It says that Kerik "blocked the promotion of a qualified jail supervisor" because the man had reprimanded a female correction officer Kerik had dated.

Is there anything here? I don't know. But I do know that as homeland security czar, Kerik will have plenty of police authority. This is a position with enormous power and where we really don't want someone who is tone-deaf to civil liberties and who is apt to send his guys out into the night on armed errands for his pals.

The Senate ought not to go so gaga over Kerik's cinematic life story that it overlooks these troubling incidents. It could be that they all can be explained. But it could also be that Kerik cuts too many corners, that he has a certain understandable infatuation with his own image and a tendency to bully.

Whatever the case, until these questions are answered, the proposed head of Homeland Security is making me, for one, feel anything but secure.

Link

Quote[/b] ]All hail to Caligula's horse

Bush's new head of homeland security is perfect for the job

Sidney Blumenthal

Thursday December 9, 2004

The Guardian

In the legend of the war on terrorism, Bernard Kerik, with his trademark shaven head, bristling moustache and black belt in karate, occupies a special place as rough and ready hero. Having risen from military policeman to narcotics detective to New York City police commissioner, he finds himself on 9/11 shoulder to shoulder with Mayor Rudy Giuliani. As the towers crumble the mayor confides in his buddy: "Bernie, thank God George Bush is president."

After the invasion of Iraq, Bush assigns Kerik to train the new Iraqi security forces. Mission accomplished, he returns to Giuliani Partners and becomes motivational speaker to captains of industry, his net worth skyrocketing. One of his most notable aphorisms: "Political criticism is our enemies' best friend." Kerik, the decorated detective, leads an investigation into the safety of cheaper Canadian prescription drugs and accompanies Giuliani before the Senate subcommittee on investigations where he testifies on their danger. (Kerik and Giuliani are rewarded handsomely by their client, the US pharmaceutical drug lobby.)

After John Kerry closes the gap in the presidential debates, Kerik rushes to the rescue, ominously warning of terrorist attacks, "If you put Senator Kerry in the White House, I think you are going to see that happen." Finally, Bush announces Bernard Kerik as the new secretary of homeland security.

The department of homeland security is a bureaucratic Byzantium consisting of 22 agencies with a huge budget exceeding $40bn. Bernard Kerik's appointment was suggested to Bush by Giuliani. With this favour, Kerik's meteoric career has reached its zenith. The high school dropout Kerik fathered an illegitimate daughter in Korea, whom he refused to acknowledge and support. He became a bodyguard for Saudi royals and then a New York narcotics cop. In 1993, he was tapped as Giuliani's chauffeur and bodyguard.

Giuliani made Kerik deputy police commissioner and chief of the corrections department. One million dollars in taxpayers' money used to buy tobacco for inmates disappeared into a private foundation run by Kerik without any accounting. In 2000, Giuliani leapfrogged Kerik over many more qualified candidates to appoint him police commissioner.

Kerik spent much of his time after 9/11 writing a self-promoting autobiography, The Lost Son. The city's conflict of interest board eventually fined him $2,500 for using three policemen to conduct his research.

Dispatched to Iraq to whip security forces into shape, Kerik dubbed himself the "interim interior minister of Iraq." British police advisers called him the "Baghdad terminator", and reported that his reckless bullying was alienating Iraqis. "I will be there at least six months," he said. He left after three.

In waging bureaucratic battles among complex organisations and players, Kerik has less experience in Washington than Baghdad. He cannot be expected to change the funding formula determined by Bush's political calculations to favour interior Republican states. And, undoubtedly, many of those seeking the department's lucrative contracts will be signing up as clients of Giuliani Partners. The looting of Washington, unlike post-invasion Iraq, is legal.

In line with other second-term cabinet appointments - Alberto Gonzales as attorney general, Condoleezza Rice as secretary of state - Kerik will be an enforcer, a loyalist and an incompetent. The resemblance is less to Inspector Clouseau or Chauncy Gardner than to Caligula's horse.

Link

Quote[/b] ]Questions for Mr. Kerik

We've been puzzled by President Bush's choice of Bernard Kerik, who was the police commissioner under Mayor Rudolph Giuliani, as the homeland security secretary. Before the Senate signs off on his nomination, there are a lot of questions to ask about Mr. Kerik's readiness for this job, and about some troubling parts of his record. If he is confirmed, Congress will want to keep a close eye on him and his department.

Mr. Kerik has some strengths. He has an impressive personal story: he overcame a troubled family background to lead the nation's largest police force. He has considerable experience in law enforcement and antiterrorism activity. It is also welcome that he is a New Yorker, given the city's unique history with terrorism and the unfairness of the formula used to allocate homeland security money, which favors Wyoming over New York.

But other parts of his record are less reassuring. A homeland security secretary should be above politics and respectful of civil liberties. But when he stumped for President Bush this year, Mr. Kerik engaged in fearmongering. He told The New York Daily News that he was worried about another terrorist attack and that "if you put Senator Kerry in the White House, I think you are going to see that happen." And he was quoted in Newsday as saying this about opponents of the Iraq war: "Political criticism is our enemies' best friend."

There are chapters of Mr. Kerik's career that are worthy of particular scrutiny. In the summer of 2003, he spent several months in Iraq training police officers. But his time there appears to have been cut short, right around the time of some serious terrorist attacks, and the state of the force since his departure has been bleak. Given the relevance of that work to his new duties, it would be instructive to know what, if anything, went wrong.

The public is also entitled to know more about his work for Giuliani-Kerik L.L.C., a consulting business he operates with Mr. Giuliani, who reportedly had a large hand in getting him his new position. Mr. Kerik should offer assurances that former clients and colleagues will not get preferential treatment. He has had difficulty with ethical lines in the past. In 2002, he paid a fine for using a police sergeant and two detectives to research his autobiography.

Then there is Mr. Kerik's enormously profitable membership on the board of Taser International, the stun-gun maker. Tasers are marketed as nonlethal, but Amnesty International says more than 70 people have died in the United States and Canada since 2001 after being shocked with them.

One of the most glaring weaknesses in Mr. Kerik's résumé is his limited experience working with Congress and official Washington. The Senate may want to encourage him to bring in experienced top staff members for the heated battles sure to come.

Link

Quote[/b] ]Kerik made millions from agency contractor

Homeland Security nominee sat on board of stun-gun maker

Bernard Kerik

The Associated Press

Updated: 10:20 a.m. ET Dec. 9, 2004

WASHINGTON - Bernard Kerik, President Bush's choice to run the Homeland Security Department, made $6.2 million by exercising stock options he received from a company that sold stun guns to the department — and seeks more business with it.

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Taser International was one of many companies that received consulting advice from Kerik after he left his job as New York City police commissioner in 2001, when he was earning $150,500 a year. Kerik remains on Taser's board of directors, although the company and the White House said he planned to sever the relationship.

Partnering with former New York Mayor Rudolph Giuliani and also operating independently, Kerik has had business arrangements with manufacturers of prescription drugs, computer software and bulletproof materials, as well as companies selling nuclear power, telephone service, insurance and security advice for Americans working abroad.

The man who led the New York Police Department on Sept. 11, 2001, has been effusively praised by Senate Republicans and Democrats for his management during and after the attacks. He served the Defense Department in Iraq in 2003 as interior minister under the former U.S. occupation authority.

Federal ethics rules state that executive branch employees should avoid participating in decisions where their impartiality could be questioned, unless they receive approval from an agency ethics official.

Kerik's office said he was not available for comment for this story, but a White House spokesman, Brian Besanceney, said the nominee would avoid any possible conflict of interest.

"Commissioner Kerik is committed to the highest ethical standards and will divest all his holdings in Taser upon Senate confirmation to avoid a conflict of interest," Besanceney said. "In order to avoid even the appearance of a conflict he will comply with all ethics laws and rules to avoid actions that affect former clients or organizations where he served as a director."

Kerik and other former New York City officials joined the ex-mayor in Giuliani Partners, a consulting firm. In 2003, Kerik became chief executive officer of an affiliate consulting company, Giuliani-Kerik. Many of the clients needed security expertise.

Michael Hess, senior managing director of Giuliani Partners, said Kerik will be severed from Giuliani Partners and Giuliani-Kerik shortly. Neither company has federal contracts and neither does lobbying work, said Hess, a New York corporation counsel under Giuliani.

Taser International President Tom Smith, in an interview, said the company has sold Homeland Security between 300 and 500 Taser guns, which fire an electrical charge that disables a person. He said the cost was about $1,000 each, including holsters, batteries and cartridges.

"We're obviously hoping for further expansion," Smith said. "I don't see how it's going to be a conflict because he will be retiring from the board. I'm sure we're going to get questions, but I don't expect we'll get preferential treatment."

Smith said he doubts that competition for future contracts would be possible, since Taser is the only major manufacturer of the stun guns now used by some 6,000 law enforcement agencies.

Taser's chief executive officer, Patrick Smith, said Kerik has been a speaker for Taser at law enforcement conferences, presented checks on behalf of the company to families of fallen police officers and advised Taser on making sales presentations to police chiefs.

According to filings with the Securities and Exchange Commission by the Scottsdale, Ariz., company, Kerik exercised his options and sold stock in November 2003 for $913,500. He made another sale last month for $5.85 million, for a total of $6.76 million, benefiting from a huge increase in the value of Taser stock during the period when he held the options.

The SEC records show that Kerik's price for the options — counting both sales — was $567,838, giving him a profit of $6.2 million.

Kerik, who began on the company board in May 2002, also was compensated at the rate of $5,000 a year for participating in board meetings.

Since May this year, Kerik has served on the board of MedAire, a Tempe, Ariz., company that provides a global medical network for travelers needing assistance and consultations for Americans living abroad who face an immediate security crisis.

Brant Galloway, a spokesman for the company, declined to disclose Kerik's compensation as a director, a consultant and as chairman of the firm's compensation committee, which approves salary adjustments for senior executives.

Kerik has played a key security consultant's role for a number of Kerik and Giuliani clients. Among them:

* Purdue Pharma, the company that makes the narcotic painkiller OxyContin. Kerik helped the company improve security at two manufacturing plants after it experienced employee theft and found that additional security measurers were needed for the highly regulated drug. Kerik worked to improve the capacity of safes to secure the product, upgrade camera surveillance and install other security measures.

* The Pharmaceutical Research and Manufacturers of America, the drug industry association that opposes importation of medicine from Canada and elsewhere. Kerik visited ports, reviewed prescription drug Internet sites and helped prepare a report for the industry on dangers of importation. He told a government task force in April that allowing imports could invite terrorists to purchase drugs legally and use them in a biological attack

* Entergy Nuclear Northeast, operator of five nuclear power plants. Kerik and others helped ensure the plants were operated with state-of-the-art security.

Looks like Bush found himself a J. Edgar Hoover/Himmler wanna be for the job. Should fit nicely in with TBA's plans I imagine...

[billybob2002 0]

Is not Kerik the guy that quit after 3 months training Iraqi police? Anyway, Rummy is not Patton...

[shinRaiden 0]

Yay, we go to court now...

Quote[/b] ]

NO. 7 6 3 2 1 - 6

DAVID T. McDONALD and RONALD

TARO SUYEMATSU; SANFORD

SIDELL; BRENT CAMPBELL; and

HILLARY DENDY, Petitioner-Electors,

and WASHINGTON STATE

DEMOCRATIC CENTRAL COMMITTEE,

Petitioners,

v.

SECRETARY OF STATE SAM REED;

KING COUNTY RECORDS,

ELECTIONS AND LICENSING

SERVICES DIVISION and DEAN

LOGAN, ITS DIRECTOR; FRANKLIN

COUNTY AUDITOR; PEND OREILLE

COUNTY AUDITOR; and PIERCE

COUNTY AUDITOR as representatives

of WASHINGTON STATE COUNTY

AUDITOR CANVASSING BOARDS,

Respondents.

------------

This matter comes before the court on petitioners’ Petition by Electors and Petition for Writ of Mandamus and Other Relief, together with Petitioners’ Motion and Brief in Support of Emergency Partial Relief and various supporting papers. Respondents have filed responses and supporting papers, and Dino Rossi and the Washington State Republican Party have moved to intervene as respondents.

IT IS HEREBY ORDERED:

(1) The motion to intervene is granted, as is attorney Mark Braden’s application for admission to practice pro hac vice in the matter;

(2) The matter is set for oral argument before the en banc court at 1:30 p.m. (GMT-8) on Monday, December 13, 2004; and

(3) The recount reportedly set to begin on December 13, 2004, may commence under the rules and procedures now in place, subject to later order by the court.

Basically, the Democratic party is seeking to reverse Federal Supreme Court rulings, and even the prior opinion as State Attorney General of the losing Democratic Govenor candidate, that adding in previously invalidated ballots in a recount is illegal.

This will be carried live by TV-Washington locally and C-SPAN nationally, it's not on CSPAN's web calendar yet though.

Seattle Putrid Incitor

Quote[/b] ]

Nineteen new ballots turned up in Mason County yesterday as election officials there and in five other counties began hand-recounting ballots to resolve the governor's race that Republican Dino Rossi won by just 42 votes.

Rossi's lead over Democrat Christine Gregoire grew by three votes when the additional votes were factored in.

"This is exactly why we needed to do a hand recount," said Kirstin Brost, spokeswoman for state Democrats. "These are 19 votes that the machines couldn't count. They represent 19 people whose votes should matter."

Mason and Garfield counties completed manual retallies of 26,289 votes, less than 1 percent of the 2.8 million cast statewide for governor last month.

Clark, Skamania, San Juan and Benton counties also began their hand recounts yesterday. King County, with about 900,000 ballots, has by far the most to retally. It began preparations for its recount and hopes to begin tomorrow.

Last week the Democrats demanded and agreed to pay for the statewide hand recount after the original tally that had Rossi ahead by 261 votes and the automatic machine recount that gave him a 42-vote margin of victory.

Secretary of State Sam Reed said he does not expect much variance between the second mechanical count and the statewide hand recount due to be completed shortly before Christmas.

He was not surprised that the count in Garfield County yielded identical totals.

"But 42 votes is such a small number that (it) is well within the reach of a few," Reed said. "We have no idea how this race is going to come out."

Democrats have also filed a lawsuit with the state Supreme Court asking, among other things, that county elections officials reinspect about 15,000 ballots deemed invalid before the first two counts.

Reed, who was named in the lawsuit, has said the law is clear and has instructed county election officials not to reinspect rejected votes.

The high court yesterday agreed to hear oral arguments Monday.

Mason County Elections Superintendent Pat Sykora said none of the additional votes counted yesterday had been previously rejected.

Instead, reinspection of the19 legal ballots revealed voter intent that had not been picked up by machines. In most cases, the canvassing board discovered partially detached chads in the punch-card ballots and counted the votes, Sykora said. Three other ballots had been legally corrected by the voter.

Brost said the Democrats have been arguing all along that a race this close merits taking a closer look.

"It's about an accurate count," Brost said. "(Rossi) picked up three votes; we are not arguing these results."

Brost asked rhetorically if the Republicans think these votes should have been thrown out.

"That's not an issue," said Rossi's spokeswoman, Mary Lane. "We don't want to throw out legal ballots. Rossi doesn't oppose a hand recount, and we believe that if it's done by the rules, that he will win for a third time."

Rossi and the Republicans have saved their harshest criticism not for the manual recount but for the Democrat's contention that rejected votes be reconsidered.

"The problem we have is Christine Gregoire wants to change the rules," Lane said. "I hope the court will not decide to change the standards for elections that have been in place for decades."

In King County, election workers began sorting ballots and laying the groundwork for the hand recount.

Elections officials there are dealing with a record number of ballots -- 594,000 absentees and 305,000 polling-place ballots. The number is so enormous that it is taking 80 recount boards, each with three workers, two days just to sort them before counting begins.

Sorting of the poll ballots by precinct began yesterday in an otherwise mostly empty office building at Boeing Field while sorting of absentees by legislative district began at a county mail-ballot operations facility in south Seattle. County Elections Superintendent Bill Huennekens called it "just a laborious process."

Starting tomorrow, he said, election officials hope to begin the actual recount, by boards that each consist of one Democrat, one Republican and one county appointee, and watched over by as many as 34 observers from each party.

Security was tight at both recount sites yesterday. Sheriff's deputies watched who came in and out of the sorting rooms. Workers and visitors were prohibited from taking purses, coats and other items into the room. News media and other visitors were restricted to an area roped off from the sorting. Everyone had to sign in and sign out.

Election supervisors were assigned white badges, other election staffers orange badges and political party observers white badges. County recount board workers wore blue badges, Democratic board workers green, Republicans red and news media yellow badges. Party observers and visitors aren't allowed to talk with recount workers.

The county and the political parties have recruited workers -- mostly retirees, unemployed or other people with time on their hands -- to work six days a week, 10 hours a day, for $12.70 an hour. Half the boards will work all day Saturday and the other half all day Sunday.

"It's not the most exciting thing in the world," said Will Affleck-Asch, an unpaid Democratic Party observer from Fremont who is volunteering part time.

Huennekens said the work schedule is "a compromise between people having lives -- it's the holiday season -- and our wanting to get it right" in the recount.

If the recount goes according to election officials' estimate, the counting will be completed three days before Christmas.

Coordinators for both parties said they were generally satisfied with the procedure.

"We've got very stringent, but for the most part reasonable, rules," said Paul Berry, a King County coordinator for the state Democratic Party.

"It seems as though it should work," agreed Dan Brady, the King County recount coordinator for the state Republican Party. "There's a lot of activity here. That's our challenge, to keep an eye on everything and make sure it works."

In the hand recount, once the ballots are sorted, each recount board will receive one precinct's ballots at a time. They will be divided into piles, for votes for Rossi, for Gregoire, for Libertarian candidate Ruth Bennett and other piles for under-votes (in which no vote was cast for governor), over-votes (those cast for more than one candidate for governor) and write-in votes.

Each Democrat and Republican will count all of each precinct's ballots.

If the counts don't match, they will count again, Huennekens said, and the recorder, or third recount board member, then will count them. If the counts still don't match, they will be given to another board to count -- something Huennekens considers highly unlikely.