Ex-RoNiN 0 Posted September 22, 2002 Shamelessly ripped from another board ******************************** Warranties This was allegedly posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas Website by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of course, does not have a sense of humor, and made the web department take it down immediately (for once, the 'IMPORTANT' note at the end is worth a read too...) ********************************* Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires. 1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other First Name: ............................................ Initial: ........ Last Name:.............................................. Password: .............................. (max. 8 char) Code Name:.............................................. Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: ........... ........... 2. Which model of aircraft did you purchase? [_] F-14 Tomcat [_] F-15 Eagle [_] F-16 Falcon [_] F-117A Stealth [_] Classified 3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 20......./......./...... 4. Serial Number:........................................ 5. Please indicate where this product was purchased: [_] Received as gift / aid package [_] Catalogue / showroom [_] Independent arms broker [_] Mail order [_] Discount store [_] Government surplus [_] Classified 6. Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased: [_] Heard loud noise, looked up [_] Store display [_] Espionage [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer [_] Was attacked by one 7. Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product: [_] Style / appearance [_] Speed / maneuverability [_] Price / value [_] Comfort / convenience [_] Kickback / bribe [_] Recommended by salesperson [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation [_] Advanced Weapons Systems [_] Back room politics [_] Negative experience opposing one in combat 8. Please indicate the location(s) where this product will be used: [_] North America [_] Iraq [_] Iraq [_] Aircraft carrier [_] Iraq [_] Europe [_] Iraq [_] Middle East (not Iraq) [_] Iraq [_] Africa [_] Iraq [_] Asia / Far East [_] Iraq [_] Misc. Third World countries [_] Iraq [_] Classified [_] Iraq 9. Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future: [_] Color TV [_] VCR [_] ICBM [_] Killer Satellite [_] CD Player [_] Air-to-Air Missiles [_] Space Shuttle [_] Home Computer [_] Nuclear Weapon 10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that apply [_] Communist / Socialist [_] Terrorist [_] Crazed [_] Neutral [_] Democratic [_] Dictatorship [_] Corrupt [_] Primitive / Tribal 11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product? [_] Deficit spending [_] Cash [_] Suitcases of cocaine [_] Oil revenues [_] Personal check [_] Credit card [_] Ransom money [_] Traveler's check 12. Your occupation: [_] Homemaker [_] Sales / marketing [_] Revolutionary [_] Clerical [_] Mercenary [_] Tyrant [_] Middle management [_] Eccentric billionaire [_] Defense Minister / General [_] Retired [_] Student 13. To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis: [_] Golf [_] Boating / sailing [_] Sabotage [_] Running / jogging [_] Propaganda / misinformation [_] Destabilization / overthrow [_] Defaulting on loans [_] Gardening [_] Crafts [_] Black market / smuggling [_] Collectibles / collections [_] Watching sports on TV [_] Wines [_] Interrogation / torture [_] Household pets [_] Crushing rebellions [_] Espionage / reconnaissance [_] Fashion / clothing [_] Border disputes [_] Mutually Assured Destruction Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes! Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to: McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION Marketing Department, Military Aerospace Division IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email, although the kelpie next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert Notice from Microsoft. However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites, whisk and place in a warm oven for 40 minutes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ralphwiggum 6 Posted September 22, 2002 LOL! so true..... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Major Fubar 0 Posted September 22, 2002 LOL...nice one. I might as well post this here, rather than start a new topic. A friend emailed this to me earlier today: </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">> > > Chicken Story > > > > > > > > > > > > >>Sometimes it DOES take a Rocket Scientist!! (true story) Scientists >at > > > >>NASA built a gun specifically to launch dead chickens at the >windshields > > > >>of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at > > > >>maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of > > > >>collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the >windshields. > > > >> > > > >>British engineers heard about the gun and were eager to test it on >the > > > >>windshields of their new high speed trains. Arrangements were made, >and > > a > > > >>gun was sent to the British engineers. When the gun was fired, the > > > >>engineers stood shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel, >crashed > > > >>into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted >through > > > >>the control console,snapped the engineer's backrest in two and >embedded > > > >>itself in the back wall of the cabin, like an arrow shot from a bow. >The > > > >>horrified Brits sent NASA the disastrous results of the experiment, > > along > > > >>with the designs of the windshield and begged the US scientists for > > > >>suggestions. > > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > > > >>You're going to love this... > > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > > > >>NASA responded with a one line memo: "Defrost the chicken."<span id='postcolor'> Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frisbee 0 Posted September 22, 2002 Both are hilarious :] 'weapon : chicken' 'target t80,500' 'fire' 't80 is history' But the survey about mcdonnel douglas is more of subtle humour :] Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Col. Kurtz 0 Posted September 23, 2002 Whats really funny is that Mc Donald Douglas dont make half those planes. Grumman make the F-14 Tomcat Lokhead make the F-117 Unless Mc Donald Douglas have taken over these companies(which is highly possible) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
edc 0 Posted September 23, 2002 Actually McDonnell Douglas is now part of Boeing. Â They have been since 96 I think. PS <span style='font-size:13pt;line-height:100%'><span style='color:red'>This is my 200th post!!!</span></span> Edit: Â Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Renagade 0 Posted September 23, 2002 and if it goes up another 100 HIS HEAD WILL EXPLODE ARGH!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Col. Kurtz 0 Posted September 23, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Ex-RoNiN @ Sep. 22 2002,18:39)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">********************************* Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires. 1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [X] Classified [_] Other First Name: Insane............................................ Initial: ID........ Last Name:Duke.............................................. Password: ..*******............................ (max. 8 char) Code Name:Col. Kurtz.............................................. Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: .?.......... ........... 2. Which model of aircraft did you purchase? [_] F-14 Tomcat [X] F-15 Eagle [_] F-16 Falcon [X] F-117A Stealth [X] Classified 3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 2002......./9......./20...... 4. Serial Number:.778093535....................................... 5. Please indicate where this product was purchased: [_] Received as gift / aid package [_] Catalogue / showroom [_] Independent arms broker [X] Mail order [_] Discount store [_] Government surplus [_] Classified 6. Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased: [X] Heard loud noise, looked up [_] Store display [X] Espionage [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer [X] Was attacked by one 7. Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product: [X] Style / appearance [_] Speed / maneuverability [_] Price / value [_] Comfort / convenience [_] Kickback / bribe [_] Recommended by salesperson [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation [_] Advanced Weapons Systems [_] Back room politics [X] Negative experience opposing one in combat 8. Please indicate the location(s) where this product will be used: [X] North America [X] Iraq [X] Iraq [_] Aircraft carrier [X] Iraq [X] Europe [X] Iraq [X] Middle East (not Iraq) [X] Iraq [X] Africa [X] Iraq [X] Asia / Far East [X] Iraq [X] Misc. Third World countries [X] Iraq [X] Classified [X] Iraq 9. Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future: [X] Color TV [X] VCR [X] ICBM [_] Killer Satellite [_] CD Player [X] Air-to-Air Missiles [_] Space Shuttle [X] Home Computer [X] Nuclear Weapon 10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that apply [X] Communist / Socialist [X] Terrorist [X] Crazed [_] Neutral [_] Democratic [X] Dictatorship [X] Corrupt [_] Primitive / Tribal 11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product? [_] Deficit spending [_] Cash [_] Suitcases of cocaine [_] Oil revenues [X] Personal check [_] Credit card [_] Ransom money [_] Traveler's check 12. Your occupation: [_] Homemaker [_] Sales / marketing [X] Revolutionary [_] Clerical [_] Mercenary [_] Tyrant [_] Middle management [_] Eccentric billionaire [X] Defense Minister / General [_] Retired [X] Student 13. To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis: [_] Golf [_] Boating / sailing [X] Sabotage [_] Running / jogging [X] Propaganda / misinformation [X] Destabilization / overthrow [_] Defaulting on loans [_] Gardening [_] Crafts [_] Black market / smuggling [_] Collectibles / collections [_] Watching sports on TV [_] Wines [X] Interrogation / torture [_] Household pets [X] Crushing rebellions [X] Espionage / reconnaissance [_] Fashion / clothing [X] Border disputes [X] Mutually Assured Destruction<span id='postcolor'> Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SKULLS_Viper 0 Posted September 23, 2002 Warranties This was allegedly posted very briefly on the McDonnell Douglas Website by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of course, does not have a sense of humor, and made the web department take it down immediately (for once, the 'IMPORTANT' note at the end is worth a read too...) ********************************* Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires. 1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [x] Other First Name:James Initial: A Last Name:Bond Password: ******** (max. 8 char) Code Name:*** ***** Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: None o y'er dr'n buisness 2. Which model of aircraft did you purchase? [_] F-14 Tomcat [_] F-15 Eagle [_] F-16 Falcon [x] F-117A Stealth [_] Classified 3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 2002/22/09 4. Serial Number:*****-******* 5. Please indicate where this product was purchased: [_] Received as gift / aid package [_] Catalogue / showroom [_] Independent arms broker [x] Mail order [_] Discount store [_] Government surplus [_] Classified 6. Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased: [_] Heard loud noise, looked up [_] Store display [_] Espionage [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer [x] Was attacked by one 7. Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product: [x] Style / appearance [_] Speed / maneuverability [_] Price / value [_] Comfort / convenience [_] Kickback / bribe [_] Recommended by salesperson [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation [x] Advanced Weapons Systems [_] Back room politics [x] Negative experience opposing one in combat 8. Please indicate the location(s) where this product will be used: [x] North America [x] Iraq [_] Iraq [_] Aircraft carrier [_] Iraq [_] Europe [_] Iraq [x] Middle East (not Iraq) [_] Iraq [_] Africa [_] Iraq [_] Asia / Far East [_] Iraq [_] Misc. Third World countries [_] Iraq [x] Classified [_] Iraq [x] school 9. Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future: [x] Color TV [_] VCR [_] ICBM [_] Killer Satellite [_] CD Player [x] Air-to-Air Missiles [_] Space Shuttle [x] Home Computer [x] Nuclear Weapon 10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that apply [_] Communist / Socialist [x] Terrorist [_] Crazed [_] Neutral [_] Democratic [_] Dictatorship [_] Corrupt [_] Primitive / Tribal 11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product? [_] Deficit spending [_] Cash [x] Suitcases of cocaine [_] Oil revenues [_] Personal check [_] Credit card [_] Ransom money [_] Traveler's check 12. Your occupation: [_] Homemaker [_] Sales / marketing [_] Revolutionary [_] Clerical [_] Mercenary [_] Tyrant [_] Middle management [_] Eccentric billionaire [_] Defense Minister / General [_] Retired [_] Student [x] Bum 13. To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis: [_] Golf [_] Boating / sailing [x] Sabotage [_] Running / jogging [_] Propaganda / misinformation [_] Destabilization / overthrow [_] Defaulting on loans [x] Gardening [_] Crafts [x] Black market / smuggling [_] Collectibles / collections [x] Watching sports on TV [_] Wines [x] Interrogation / torture [_] Household pets [_] Crushing rebellions [_] Espionage / reconnaissance [_] Fashion / clothing [_] Border disputes [x] Mutually Assured Destruction [x] Knitting Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes! Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to: McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION Marketing Department, Military Aerospace Division IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email, although the kelpie next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert Notice from Microsoft. However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites, whisk and place in a warm oven for 40 minutes. (Some restictions apply) [X] Agree  [_] Disagree Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SKULLS_Viper 0 Posted September 23, 2002 We are not responsible for injury or death, caused by mishandling of plane, getting shot down, or malfunction.There is no warranty for your plane.Remeber, don't drink and fly! [_]Agree [_]Disagree Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ale2999 0 Posted September 23, 2002 that is pretty funny. I wonder if the guy who put that up got fired. lol Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ralphwiggum 6 Posted September 23, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (SKULLS_Viper @ Sep. 23 2002,05:18)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 2002/22/09 <span id='postcolor'> LOL! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Col. Kurtz 0 Posted September 23, 2002 Never knew there were 22 months in the year! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sweeper 0 Posted September 23, 2002 Sweeper doing shopping for the airbase i had to fill it out. 1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [X] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other First Name:UNKNOWN Initial: S Last Name:UNKNOWN Password: ******* (max. 8 char) Code Name:*** ***** Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: Unknown 2. Which model of aircraft did you purchase? [X] F-14 Tomcat [X] F-15 Eagle [_] F-16 Falcon [X] F-117A Stealth [X] Classified 3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 2002/23/09 4. Serial Number:*****-******* 5. Please indicate where this product was purchased: [_] Received as gift / aid package [_] Catalogue / showroom [_] Independent arms broker [_] Mail order [_] Discount store [_] Government surplus [X] Classified 6. Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased: [_] Heard loud noise, looked up [_] Store display [X] Espionage [_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally [_] Political lobbying by manufacturer [_] Was attacked by one 7. Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product: [_] Style / appearance [X] Speed / maneuverability [_] Price / value [_] Comfort / convenience [_] Kickback / bribe [_] Recommended by salesperson [_] McDonnell Douglas reputation [x] Advanced Weapons Systems [_] Back room politics [_] Negative experience opposing one in combat 8. Please indicate the location(s) where this product will be used: [x] North America [_] Iraq [_] Iraq [_] Aircraft carrier [_] Iraq [X] Europe [_] Iraq [_] Middle East (not Iraq) [_] Iraq [_] Africa [_] Iraq [_] Asia / Far East [_] Iraq [_] Misc. Third World countries [_] Iraq [x] Classified [_] Iraq [x] school 9. Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future: [_] Color TV [_] VCR [X] ICBM [X] Killer Satellite [_] CD Player [X] Air-to-Air Missiles [_] Space Shuttle [_] Home Computer [X] Nuclear Weapon 10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that apply [X] Communist / Socialist [_] Terrorist [_] Crazed [_] Neutral [_] Democratic [_] Dictatorship [_] Corrupt [_] Primitive / Tribal 11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product? [_] Deficit spending [_] Cash [_] Suitcases of cocaine [_] Oil revenues [_] Personal check [_] Credit card [X] Ransom money [_] Traveler's check 12. Your occupation: [_] Homemaker [_] Sales / marketing [X] Revolutionary [_] Clerical [X] Mercenary [_] Tyrant [_] Middle management [_] Eccentric billionaire [_] Defense Minister / General [_] Retired [_] Student [_] Bum 13. To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis: [_] Golf [_] Boating / sailing [X] Sabotage [_] Running / jogging [_] Propaganda / misinformation [_] Destabilization / overthrow [_] Defaulting on loans [_] Gardening [_] Crafts [X] Black market / smuggling [_] Collectibles / collections [_] Watching sports on TV [_] Wines [X] Interrogation / torture [_] Household pets [X] Crushing rebellions [_] Espionage / reconnaissance [_] Fashion / clothing [_] Border disputes [X] Mutually Assured Destruction [_] Knitting Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes! Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to: McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION Marketing Department, Military Aerospace Division IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email, although the kelpie next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert Notice from Microsoft. However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites, whisk and place in a warm oven for 40 minutes. (Some restictions apply) [X] Agree [_] Disagree Purchase complete. however what I bought else is none of your dang buisness. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theavonlady 2 Posted September 23, 2002 From now on, when purchasing McDonnell Douglas products and supplies, could you please use my affiliate URL McDonnellDouglas.com/store.cgi?affiliate=theavonlady;markup=25% Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Scorpio 0 Posted September 23, 2002 Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires. 1. [x] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Lt. [_] Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_] Other First Name:Sam Initial: A Last Name:Adham Password: ******** (max. 8 char) Code Name:*** ***** Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: Classified 2. Which model of aircraft did you purchase? [_] F-14 Tomcat [_] F-15 Eagle [x] F-16 Falcon [_] F-117A Stealth [_] Classified 3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 2002/22/09 4. Serial Number:*****-******* 5. Please indicate where this product was purchased: [_] Received as gift / aid package [_] Catalogue / showroom [_] Independent arms broker [_] Mail order [_] Discount store [_] Government surplus [x] Classified 6. Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you have just purchased: [x] Heard loud noise, looked up [x] I made one. 7. Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product: [x] Style / appearance [x] Speed / maneuverability [x] Advanced Weapons Systems 8. Please indicate the location(s) where this product will be used: [x] School 9. Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future: [x] Color TV [x] VCR [x] ICBM [x] Killer Satellite [x] CD Player [x] Air-to-Air Missiles [x] Space Shuttle [x] Home Computer [x] Nuclear Weapon 10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Indicate all that apply [_] Communist / Socialist [_] Terrorist [_] Crazed [_] Neutral [_] Democratic [_] Dictatorship [_] Corrupt [x] School-boy 11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product? [_] Dad's Credit card [_] Dad's Credit card [_] Dad's Credit card [_] Dad's Credit card [_] Dad's Credit card 12. Your occupation: [x] Student 13. To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis: [x] Watching sports on TV [x] Sex [x] Sex Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia. As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes! Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to: McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION Marketing Department, Military Aerospace Division IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humor or irrational religious beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or implicitly) and constitutes an irritating social faux pas. Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct context somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the transmission of this email, although the kelpie next door is living on borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert Notice from Microsoft. However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites, whisk and place in a warm oven for 40 minutes. (Some restictions apply) [X] Agree [_] Disagree Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
