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scottmillerukctrg

some kind of existencial crisis

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think about this situation.

there is a smart guy in your class he's indeed smart, he oftenly gets As and unlike most ppl who have the average of getting Cs. he is considered to be the smartest of the grade and bla bla bla it's been like that since you know him.

but then surprisingly he gets a D grade on an exam.

sometime later another D.

my question is, what would you think about that? i mean would you think he's been cheating, or he's just been trough a hard time, or he is normal like any1 else? would you change your opinion this guy? why?

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Stress can do it. A bad spot of luck, too. A distraction perhaps- maybe he got a girlfriend and has been studying other... stuff.

Maybe he bought ARMA III and is enthralled in the campaign, or more likely, is spending 14 hours a day standing naked in front of a VAS ammobox on a CTI server.

Cheating, sure. Maybe. But probably not.

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If you've known him for a long time - and he's really smart, give him credit for it based on your knowledge of him, not based on his current academic situation.

Also, if your usage of 'crisis' wasn't just hyperbole, maybe it is time you said something like "damn dude - a D? that's not like you.. what's up?" or something?

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Nothing wrong with getting some feedback on a problem. If we are big enough to talk about alcohol and share our opinions on armed conflicts, we are big enough to give advice when asked for it :)

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Stress and pressure is very likely. I sometimes went straight from A to E in subjects I wasn't usually bad with. Too many exams, trouble with family, friends, work, etc. can easily cause that. It sounds like he's going through a hard time, or maybe he stopped caring about grades at all.

There's still the possibility that they kidnapped him and replaced him with one of their own, though...

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I got to admit, too many exams is quite a problem nowadays, last year for Uni (2nd year), I had 5 exams in 7 days, including 3 in 2 days (and I study that hard subject known as electrical and electronic engineering, not one of those mickey mouse degrees most in the UK do), I think my hair actually started to fall out from the stress, and of course the grades slid a bit between the first and the last exam. It doesn't surprise me that others suffer from it because everyone cracks eventually.

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well 1 exam could be a lost weekend - got drunk and didnt revise. everyone makes that mistake once.

2 exams, same drop, so maybe not even hating that teacher or subject too much.

so question is - is everything else seeming ok? can he look people in the eye? can he hold his own in conversation? does he slip off after lessons, avoid people etc. it's often the little things that give away a case of stress.

if he is stressed out then there are people who will help him - he can speak to his GP/doctor and get a brief spell of counselling - might help.

remembering my mates and me when we were teenagers, something like this could be triggered by parents arguing or divorcing, nasty situation with aggressive idiots, girlfriend break-up, new drug or alcohol habits/interests, pressure about careers, new unliked family member (like step dad) or illness no-one knows about. could be lots of things, butthe thing to notice - is it just the exams, or is something else worrying about the situation? at the end of the day a few bad exams is not very important, but if a guy is turning in on himself and strung out he may need a buddy to reach out to him.

good luck

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my question in return would be

Why does it even matter?

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Eh, Cozza, failing grades can often be one of the most visible signs of a person starting to crack. It might be a surface issue, or it might be like Men In Black 2, with failing grades being the flower sticking out of the drain, and the real problems being the gigantic frakking subway size alien worm named Jeff. It's only something to seriously worry about if there are other things that back it up. Not talking as much, not getting enough sleep, not looking people in the eye, changes in what kind of music they listen to, general state of body maintenance (haircut, shave, etc.) if a bunch of signs occur at the same time, there's probably something driving them. That something can often lead to drug use or suicide attempts, so I can see why he asked the question. It does seem a bit too OT for OT, but I've seen far worse.

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consider me an asshole but I wouldn't really care if someone in my class was having failing grades.

Considering his not being graded against me, I wouldn't see it as my problem.

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Well, by the line "it's been like that since you know him." (poor grammar isn't mine) I assume he means a friend of his, not just a random classmate. *shrug*

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