Aculaud 0 Posted July 5, 2002 Ever notice how junk mail is always based on assumptions companies make about you that are never true? Check out what the people who send me junk mail think i am: So far, i am a... -Hermaphrodite with inadequat genetalia (Due to offers for both penis enlargments AND breast enhancements) -Going bald -Smokes -Overweight -Constantly in debt -Cant get an erection -Into really sickening porn (i.e. Beastiality, rape, incest, etc.) -Paranoid -Has bad teeth -Has family with young children -Always in the market for printer cartridges I just found this so humorous i actually started keeping track. What do junk mailers think you are? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
USSoldier11B 0 Posted July 5, 2002 A gun toting NRA looney......er...nevermind. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tex -USMC- 0 Posted July 5, 2002 I get alot of emails telling me how to take advantage of my veterans benefits. And lots and lots of low fixed APR loan offers. And porn. I think they send you porn no matter what. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aculaud 0 Posted July 5, 2002 Whats especially funny...I think they actually DO think i'm a hermaphrodite. I got an e-mail with a title that said, and i quote, "Breasts and penile enlargements naturally". As if to imply that i have both. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
USSoldier11B 0 Posted July 5, 2002 I think they mean more of an either/or. Not implying that you have both. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aculaud 0 Posted July 5, 2002 How do they know? ...kidding! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theavonlady 2 Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Aculaud @ July 05 2002,07:06)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">What do junk mailers think you are?<span id='postcolor'> They think I'm you! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
InRange 0 Posted July 5, 2002 For some reason they seem to think I need a Greencard and that I'm always in debt. I think everybody gets those 'Slash your debt instantly' mails. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LauryThorn 0 Posted July 5, 2002 The worst spam comes from one's friend, though.. My girlfriends friend sends all these forwarded stupid tests, "funny" pictures, "truths" about men, "manuals" for men, etc, etc, to my g/f. I just couldn't handle receiving that kind of mail. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tex -USMC- 0 Posted July 5, 2002 Use her email address and sign up for a porn newsletter lol Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
second_draw 0 Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Tex [uSMC] @ July 05 2002,11:18)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Use her email address and sign up for a porn newsletter lol<span id='postcolor'> Use her email address and sign up for a gay porn newsletter lol... .......then everybody who sees you checking your account thinks she/he is a wierdo, trust me on this, i know somebody which the forementioned happened to them....heh heh heh. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LauryThorn 0 Posted July 5, 2002 Some stupid man/company keeps sending some interesting loan/penis enlargement/.. offers to my Hotmail account, and they always send it from the same address! So, I open a HC gay porn site, copy/paste.. It's annoying that some of those sites send a confirmation request to the subsriber, so it's not always so effective as it could be. But in 99% of the cases, replying to the spam messages only makes the spamming worse. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FetishFool 0 Posted July 5, 2002 People that send me forwards think that I'm their friend. Then I go and rape their goldfish. I'd rape their dogs and cats, but they hurt. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WKK Gimbal 0 Posted July 5, 2002 I never give my email address to anyone. Even when signing up for silly innocent sites, I use addresses like look@my.ass I never get any junkmail, which is lucky for junkmail distributors, cause if I did they would all be dead. FetishFool: Who's the kid in you sig? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 5, 2002 I have managed to stay away from junk mail for about four years. Untli about two months ago that is. Now I recieve some stupid offer every day I told Gimbal about the problem and he promised to send some of his Ninjas to take care of it but nothing hase happend. Frankly I am starting to doubt that he is the Ninja master he is supposed to be... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FetishFool 0 Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (WKK Gimbal @ July 06 2002,07:36)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">FetishFool: Who's the kid in you sig?<span id='postcolor'> http://www.teenplanet.org/images.php?type=miscweb Me 'sa loser, eh! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WKK Gimbal 0 Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (denoir @ July 05 2002,13:52)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">I told Gimbal about the problem and he promised to send some of his Ninjas to take care of it but nothing hase happend. Frankly I am starting to doubt that he is the Ninja master he is supposed to be... Â <span id='postcolor'> Impatience is the assassins worst enemy. I can give my ninjas targets, but I cannot tell them when they should strike. They are most likely moving in the shadows of the spammers, ready to flip out and kill (without thinking twice about it). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (WKK Gimbal @ July 05 2002,14:51)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Impatience is the assassins worst enemy. I can give my ninjas targets, but I cannot tell them when they should strike. They are most likely moving in the shadows of the spammers, ready to flip out and kill (without thinking twice about it).<span id='postcolor'> I don't know Gimbal, but I found one of your black dressed friends in front of my house today dead, with a frisbee in his mouth. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Albert Schweitzer 10 Posted July 5, 2002 I actually did the right things so far, I never used my home E-mail address but only hotmail ones. So far no real junkmail in my yahoo-account. Furthermore is this account good to protect you against viruses. It is only about to start that I get mails that get trough my Bulkmail filter. I did only one stupid mistake. I used my actual name for my e-mail account. I hope those people are not smart enough and use this name to send adds my post to my home address. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Albert Schweizer @ July 05 2002,15:12)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">So far no real junkmail in my yahoo-account. Furthermore is this account good to protect you against viruses. It is only about to start that I get mails that get trough my Bulkmail filter. I did only one stupid mistake. I used my actual name for my e-mail account. I hope those people are not smart enough and use this name to send adds my post to my home address. Â <span id='postcolor'> Arn't you bothered by the standard spam that yahoo lets through on occasions like chirstmas, mother's day, fourth july,valentine day and so on? I had an yahoo account for a while but it basically drove me crazy with spam Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Albert Schweitzer 10 Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote </td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">valentine<span id='postcolor'> "smart ass!" No, actually not! I get nothing like that! I use the ordinary bulkmail filter and I get an undesired add maybe once evey 2 weeks! Thats acceptable! That is 250% less than the amount of ads I get my post! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EveronVetsAgainstTheWar 0 Posted July 5, 2002 I get no junkmail. Well t hats not true. Occasionally I have gotten mail from The College Board or something telling me to sign up for the SATs and I got a few emails from Sony because I registered to see some pictures or something of Star Wars: Galaxies but now I recieve none from either because of unsubscribe. But this also makes me very depressed because now everydady when I open outlook and I have 0 unread messages it makes me realize I have no friends and I am worthless. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ran 0 Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Aculaud @ July 05 2002,06:37)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">Whats especially funny...I think they actually DO think i'm a hermaphrodite. I got an e-mail with a title that said, and i quote, "Breasts and penile enlargements naturally". As if to imply that i have both. <span id='postcolor'> LOL @ YA BUNCH OF IGNORANTS penile = the little sexy lower part of the belly of a girl it has to do with the hormones and ostrogÄnes and all the other mess that makes women penis = male genital apparel Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FetishFool 0 Posted July 5, 2002 </span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (ran @ July 06 2002,13:03)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">LOL @ YA BUNCH OF IGNORANTS penile = the little sexy lower part of the belly of a girl it has to do with the hormones and ostrogÄnes and all the other mess that makes women penis = male genital apparel<span id='postcolor'> LOL!!! I learn a new thing every day. I'm re-thinking what "penilized" means now... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
